Lost in Louisville...

I'm a reader

2008-02-20T17:43:00.000-05:00

In elementary school I participated in a reading competition. You were supposed to see how many books you could read over the summer. I ended up reading enough books to earn me a pin with a bear on it, and a t-shirt, as well. I can't remember now what the bear was about; it was an acronym, I think. B.E.A.R.--Because Everyone is A Reader? Yeah, I'm not sure what the bear was about...

I always considered myself a good reader--whatever that might mean. I even thought at some point that I loved it. I really question now whether that was ever true. Perhaps that isn't fair. I love the information available to me in books. I'm drawn to new ones all time. The problem lies in finishing any book, ever. I generally read the first 150 pages of any book and then simply put it down one day never to return to it again.

People have many theories about why I do this. Do I hate endings? Just don't like those books? Does reading bore me? I think it's more like everything interest me, so once I've read a little of any book, I find myself wanting to move on to the next great thing.

I am proud to say that I've recently finished reading a book, a whole book. I've been reading Dave Eggers' "What is the What". It's labeled as fiction, but based on the life of Valentino Achak Deng, one of the "Lost Boys" of Sudan. I'm a little embarrassed to say how much discipline I had to engage in to finish this book, but was quite pleased when it was done. I will admit that I had a little sadness when the end of the book was near, and lots of sadness throughout. It's an emotionally challenging book. I cried no fewer than three times while reading. So, fair warning if you happen to pick this one up...the tears will sneak up on you.

Who knows? Maybe this means I'll be a reader now...maybe.

Words for Today

2008-02-13T14:32:00.003-05:00

Something about these words helped prepare me for the day. I love this song...

Tracy Chapman's 'Born to Fight'

They're tryin' to dig into my soul
And take away the spirit of my god
They're tryin' to take control
And monitor my every thought

I won't let down my guard
And I was born to fight
I ain't been knocked down yet
I was born to fight
I'm the surest bet

There ain't no man no woman
No beast alive that can beat me
'Cause I'm born to fight

The Remembering and The Forgetting

2007-12-26T10:37:00.000-05:00

Some things are inevitable. In many ways, this is a hard truth...

In February, it will be five years since my stepmother received her Alzheimer's diagnosis. There have been periods where the progression of her disease seemed slow and yet quite rapid at other times. It appears to be this rather unpredictable disease when it comes to what changes will be seen with any particular individual...and when. But, one thing is very predictable here: this disease is always progressing. It's a fact that has been with us for these five years.

I am not at home much these days, and so when I make my visits the changes are quite noticeable. Life for my stepmother seems to be more disorganized these days in ways that I am sure are frustrating to both her and certainly to us. Being at home this past week tried both my patience and compassion. I never feel good about this. I want to think that I have more emotional resources to handle the irrationality of this disease than I do, but most of the time, this just isn't true. I must continually remind myself that no one deals with this perfectly, and that there are no prescribed ways of making it through.

This visit home was especially difficult because a new reality is emerging. The time is quickly approaching for my stepmother to move into a facility that is better equipped to take care of her than she can be at home. As it stands now, the plan is for her to make this move in March. I knew this plan before I went home, which made most of the trip difficult knowing that this could be the last time I see her living in a house where she has spent the past 15 years. I spent most of the trip overwhelmed by the deep sadness of this reality. A reality that simply does not feel real.

I spent time at home trying to rely on part of my faith to bring some peace to us. I found I didn't have words to pray, and I have yet to find my own...

When I returned to Louisville on Christmas Day, I began to house sit for some friends. I opened a book sitting on their coffee table; it's a prayer book for families. As I flipped through some pages I came across a prayer that I am using until I can find words of my own:

Joy in the Morning

Weeping may linger for the night

but joy comes with the morning. (Psalm 30:5b)

O Lord our God,

we will give thanks to you forever.

You heal our wounded hearts

and give us life.

You hear our cries

and raise us from the pit of death,

from dust,

from the grave of despair.

O Lord our God,

we will give thanks to you forever.

You take away our grief

and give us joy.

You turn mourning into dancing,

ashes into stars,

silence into praise.

O Lord our God,

we will give thanks to you forever.

We will give thanks to you forever.

Victory Pizza

2007-12-19T21:03:00.000-05:00

In August, Team Baby Fish Mouth won it's first Win, Lose or Draw tournament. Due to scheduling conflicts we've put off celebrating our victory. I am happy to report that we've brought an end to all of that now by making our way over to California Pizza Kitchen to spend our trophy...err, gift card. The night was packed with lots of laughing and singing. Thanks to a local radio station we were able to sing along to some of our favorite Christmas songs. My favorite? Wham!, "Last Christmas". There is something so fantastic about that song; there's no explaining it.

World Class Drawers and Guessers:
Catherine, Kate, Rachel and Tiffany B

Advent

2007-12-11T18:29:00.005-05:00

This year, I made my very own Advent calendar. It gave me the opportunity to use watercolors, scissors, glue and pastels. I LOVE crafts! So, here it is. Each day has its own window. When opened, every window reveals a word for meditation.

Some of the words include: vision, love, stillness, failure, chaos (yeah, not all the words are "feel good"...), prayer, and realm.

When I was a child

2007-12-07T00:29:00.000-05:00

My father sent me some pictures of myself as a child, and now I share them with you:

On your first birthday...

2007-11-20T18:27:00.000-05:00

...the track list of a birthday CD made in honor of my favorite one-year-old!

*Peace, Love and Sharing...*

Marvin Gaye, Ain't No Mountain High Enough

The Four Tops, I Can't Help Myself (Sugar Pie Honey Bunch)

Kristin Andreassen, Crayola Doesn't Make a Color for Your Eyes

Willie Nelson, You Are My Sunshine

Marlo Thomas and Friends, Free to Be...You and Me

The Lion King, Hakuna Matata

Randy Newman, You've Got a Friend in Me

Jack Johnson, Sharing Song

Whitney Houston, My Love is Your Love

Nickel Creek, Ode to a Butterfly

The Be Good Tanyas, The Littlest Birds

Dixie Chicks, I Hope

Jack Johnson, We're Going to Be Friends

Indigo Girls, Power of Two

Bette Midler, Baby Mine

Israel Kamakawiwo Ole', Somewhere Over the Rainbow/What a Wonderful World

Dixie Chicks, Lullaby

Let's play TAG!

2007-11-14T17:26:00.000-05:00

So, Kelly tells me that I need to share 10 random facts about myself with you.

Here they are, in no particular order:

1) I cut my finger nails 1-2 times a week.

2) I have an incredibly weak stomach, and an active imagination. Be careful what you say around me. It could be ugly for everyone.

3) I think Hell is a place where you have to wear wet socks all the time.

4) I won the Hula-hoop contest (girls division) in kindergarten.

5) In general, I don't trust people.

6) My dream jobs: city bus driver, card/postcard maker, a job at the post office--in the back where letters shoot by you really fast!

7) When I was a child, I wanted to be President...I still think this would be cool.

8) For the longest time, I had a hard time saying 'volleyball'. I would say 'volleyvall'.

9) I was 21-years-old before I understood what chicken fried steak was.

10) My twin brother is an entire foot taller than I am. He was far more advanced at learning how to tie his shoes, how to ride a bike, and how to drive a car than I was.

Eavesdropping

2007-11-11T12:21:00.000-05:00

I grew up in daycare. I know a lot of people have issues with those places, but I feel like it taught me how to share and probably built up my immune system by being around all those children with tons of disgusting germs and...nevermind...

Anyway, during the summer we would take lots of field trips and would go to the skating rink nearly every week. I LOVED skating until the age of seven. It was that year, and I'll let you know that I had become quite the skater at that point, that I cracked my kneecap in a very unfortunate roller skating accident. I decided to try out the "brake" on the front of the skate. NEVER DO THIS! I fell to the ground pretty hard and my knee has never been the same. It swelled to 6 times its usual size and I had to wear a brace for 6 weeks before the 2nd grade started. Awesome.

Once while sitting at the skating rink, I was listening to a conversation between my teachers. I was putting pieces of popcorn into my drink and watching the pieces shrivel. I heard my teacher say, "Tiffany is eavesdropping". So, for the longest time, I thought that eavesdropping was what happens to popcorn when it gets wet. Serves me right. I suppose there some kind of moral to the story here, but I don't know what it is. For the most part, you can find out some pretty interesting stuff by listening to other people's conversations.

Who needs sleep?

2007-11-08T13:07:00.000-05:00

I suffered from insomnia for several months during my senior year in high school. It was a pretty miserable time. There are some large gaps in my memory during that time, some of which was due to always being too tired to pay much attention to anything.

I would find lots of activities to do at night: TV watching, listening to music, doing crafts, staring at the wall, and occasionally cleaning my room. One night, as I cleaned my room, I found an acceptance letter to my first choice college. It had been dated three weeks earlier. I suppose if it weren't for insomnia, I may have never found it. I woke my father up in the middle of the night to tell him. He tried his best to be happy for me in the moment, but I think he was secretly building a resentment against me for disturbing his sleep. He asked me if I was sure there wasn't anything else of importance laying around my floor...(that's my father being sarcastic in the middle of the night.)

What's interesting is that when I can't sleep now, I get a little panicked. I always suspect that it's the beginning of another stretch of sleeplessness. I get particularly worried when all the methods I have for helping me get to sleep don't have the desired impact...

So, what do you do to help yourself get to sleep?

The Gorge

2007-11-05T11:07:00.000-05:00

At the end of September, I went camping with friends. Just days before I had started my new job, and the last day of camping was the day I moved into my new apartment. It was a tight squeeze to fit camping at Red River Gorge in, but we made it happen. Here are some pictures from the weekend:

Kelly and Rachel after they made us a wonderful dinner on the fire

if you look closely, you can see the moon...

Dan and Molly (my new roommate!)...Dan brought us firewood the night before and quickly became one of our heroes!

Match Made in Pumpkin Patch

2007-11-02T14:08:00.000-04:00

*WHAT YOU ARE READING IS MEANT TO BE TAKEN AS A JOKE. IN FACT, THIS POST IS THE CULMINATION OF A JOKE THAT LASTED EXACTLY SIX WEEKS, AND CONTINUES ON IN ITS OWN WAY TODAY. CATHERINE IS A DEAR FRIEND...AND ONLY A FRIEND. PLEASE FORGIVE ANY MISUNDERSTANDINGS THAT MAY HAVE OCCURRED IN PREVIOUS READINGS OF THIS POST. MY SINCERE APOLOGIES.* --tiffany b

Friends,

Perhaps I neglected to tell you this. If so, don't be upset. Things can happen fast in this life, and you just have to go with it. Such is the case here…

On October 13, 2007, Catherine and I were married in Starlight, Indiana. It's a place famous for its cheese, Christmas trees, and fried biscuits. Really, it's a lovely place. We didn't have long to plan our wedding. Our engagement was very short…6 weeks, in fact! I asked her to marry me after she put together this great combination of beets and goat cheese. You should know that there is so much more to her than just cooking. She is kind, compassionate, very creative, brilliant and always able to make me laugh. She's incredibly special, and I am blessed.

We gathered before a crowd of people waiting for a ride out to the pumpkin patch and exchanged our vows in front of a small group of friends. Our attendants, Rachel and Becky, helped to prepare us in many ways for our moment. Rachel helped Catherine to put on her head scarf and sash (which I made) and told me when it was time to present Catherine with her flowers. Becky helped to keep me calm (I was very excited) and handed me the ring when it was called for. The ceremony was short, but sweet, and we immediately departed for the pumpkin patch to enjoy time as Mrs. & Mrs. Catherine and Tiffany.

Our day continued with shopping in the store on the grounds and buying biscuits for the ride home. But, before we left, there was one more thing that needed to be done…our first dance, to our song...'When You Say Nothing At All':

**Note from Catherine**

My dear Tiff's recount of our special day is beautiful and brings tears to my eyes. Even now, as I think about it, I can hear Allison Krauss serenading us with her angel-like voice as we danced to our song, saying nothing at all. In so many ways, I'm speechless at the wonderfulness that is my new wife. The way we love and support each other compares to no other. Thank you, Tuffles, for everything. I love you!

Standstill

2007-11-01T14:09:00.000-04:00

Occasionally, you just have one of those mornings...and it's all made worse when you realize that it could have been different, if you had only taken the time to do what you needed to do...

There are so many things that I'm not paying attention to lately, and one of them has been my gas gage. Actually, I've been paying quite a bit of attention to the nice yellow flashing gas pump that let's me know I need to fill up, but I hadn't made my way to the gas station just yet. And so, I ran out of gas. I've never had this happen to me before, and had probably convinced myself it wouldn't ever happen to me. I figured I could go on testing the limits of my tank and always end up making it to the station in time. Now I know that isn't true.

I had to be pushed into a parking lot and make my way across a busy downtown intersection to purchase one of those fancy gas cans. The clerk asked me if I wanted to buy it after I placed it on the counter... REALLY? Do many people browse or comparison shop for a gas cans at 8:20 in the morning? I think not. You only pick one of these things up if you intend to buy it and at that moment.

I can say that I am now prepared for the situation should it happen again. My spill-proof gas can is safely tucked away in my trunk...

Italians Say "Chicken Pizza"

2007-10-28T11:11:00.000-04:00

On my trip to Mexico this month, I was fortunate enough to visit Chichen Itza. I've wanted to visit this site for a long time, and was particularly excited about seeing the pyramid and ball court. A long line of trees were blocking most of the view of the pyramid, El Castillo, when I first walked into the park and I could only see its base. As I walked further along, more of it came into view, until I could see the entire structure. I was overwhelmed by what I was seeing, and came close to crying. I was taken by its size and the accuracy with which the Mayan people designed and constructed the pyramid. Simply amazing.

Currently, visitors aren't allowed to climb the pyramid because there is fear of damage being done to the structure with too many climbers. I wouldn't have been one of those climbers anyway. The entire thing seemed like a crazy idea for someone else to follow-up on.

The Ball Court. After scoring one goal in this game, it's believed that a human sacrifice took place. Seriously, that's a level of commitment that is hard to understand.

Sara and me in front of the Kukulcan pyramid

Since we last talked...

2007-10-26T12:53:00.000-04:00

It's been awhile, nearly seven weeks since I've written, and a lot has happened. Yes, indeed, a lot has been happening, which is precisely the reason I haven't had time to share what's been going on.

My car tells most of the story. As I opened the car door this morning I was overwhelmed by how much stuff is in there. And, anyone who knows me well, knows how much I despise having 'stuff' around. It has a way of destroying my soul a little at a time. I'm not always so good at managing the build-up of things around me, and this becomes particularly difficult when my schedule gets rather packed. This is what has been happening, and now I'm hoping to slow things down a bit.

Car contents:

One massive bag of clean laundry, and a massive bag of clothes that need to be donated. These are in my car because I MOVED this month, and don't have a washer/dryer at the new place. The bag to donate will probably sit in my car for the next three months. This is my best guess as to how long it will take me to drop it off somewhere.
Wood chips and coffee maker. I went camping late last month and used my car to transport fire wood. My trunk may never be the same.

Photocopy of my passport. I went to Mexico this past week and made copies of my documents to give to Catherine and my father. I did this just in case people decided to get crazy and detain me. I figured this was a smart move on my part since the U.S. Government has detained and deported US citizens "back" to Mexico. I wasn't feeling the need to become one of those statistics.

Paper, paper, and more paper. In the past six weeks, I have ended a job and started a new one. My new job is located about 75 feet from my old one, but the job change involved lots of paper and books to be returned, moved, and recycled. I'm not sure everything is where it needs to be just yet.

One copy of 'Harry and the Hendersons'. My birthday was last month and I received this fantastic gift from Catherine. 'Harry and the Herndersons' is one of my favorite movies of all-time. The scene after they first hit Harry is classic. Nancy asks George if he's sure it's dead, and they have this whole exchange about whether or not he's sure. She's rolling the window up and down a lot. Cracks me up every time.

As you can read, my life has been busy. Please forgive me as I take some time to catch you up...

Year in Review

2007-09-10T22:31:00.000-04:00

I moved to Louisville one year ago today. I'm simply amazed at how fast time can pass. It was my original plan to move back to Texas as soon as my year of employment was done here, but over the past few months I've made a decision to stay here--at least for now. I haven't figured out all the words for it yet, but I do feel that I'm in a process here and leaving now would be disruptive. All in all, it's been an amazing year for me. There have been challenges to be sure, but I feel I've had the space to be honest about those things. For today though, I'm reflecting on some of my favorite moments of the year. Of course, the really great things I keep for myself, but there is still plenty to share:

1) Meeting a baby on his first day in the world. We've become best friends and he is definitely one of the people I enjoy most in this town. Saturday mornings at the Farmer's Market with him and his parents is always one of my favorite times of the weeks. I'm seriously in love with this guy!

2) Traveling home for Christmas. I've had so many weird experiences with birds this year!

3) Obama! I still think it's a great story...I cut a 3,000 people in line to see Barak Obama and I GOT TO SHAKE HIS HAND!

4) Road trip to Washington, D.C., (all three parts). I'm just happy not to be stuck on a random mountain in West Virginia!!

5) Solo camping. One of the best weekends I've had in Louisville and it was spent all by myself. If you have the chance to do something like this, you should.

6) Easter Weekend. Ah, yes, the holiest of all the weekends.

7) The pilgrimage to Colorado Spring's Focus on the Family. It's some of the best work I've done all year.

8) All things Derby. I mean, this is why I moved to Louisville in the first place, right? And, it's sad too, because I still have no idea what it all means...

9) Music. There is plenty to be talked about, but I really enjoyed seeing The Duhks.

10) Trivia. How was I spending my Monday nights before trivia?!? Quick! What's the capitol of Ecuador?

11) Serene day at Serenbe. It was needed for so many reasons. One of the best days I've had this year, without question.

12) Finally, (I think I'm ready to put this here)...I've been doing just the tiniest bit of dancing. I haven't written about this new development in my life just yet. It's true though--I have been dancing lately...and I seem to be enjoying it. I need to say that it was a significant development for me to write that just now. My comfort with admitting I like dancing is a work in progress, but I'm getting there.

Well, these are some of my favorite things from one year in Louisville. I'm both excited and curious to see how the next one will unfold.

On the Farm

2007-09-05T20:21:00.000-04:00

I spent this past Labor Day weekend on a farm outside of Knoxville, Tennessee. Rachel invited a group of us out to her grandparents' farm to celebrate the last part of summer. There is a beautiful view from the backyard, so beautiful in fact that I've decided to move there. I recognize that it's going to be hard for me to get anything done because my plan for being there is to look at the mountains, sunsets and sunrises. This seems like more than enough to occupy most of my days for now.

We spent most of the weekend hanging out on porches and eating really good food. If that sounds like the perfect way to spend time with really great people, it's because it was. Here's what some of our time looked like:

We started the weekend by going to see JRock and her band, Deek Hoi, and the everybodyfields perform at The World Grotto. (That's me, Rachel, Kate and Holly)

We spent most of Saturday on JRock's porch:

Joy and JRock preparing dinner AND Natalie and Cindy enjoying time on the porch

Rachel and Kate getting ready to take a ride. How awesome is this car?!? AND, JRock and me grilling. This was one of my favorite parts of the weekend.

There was more listening to music on Sunday night:

Carol with her guitar and Kathy with her mandolin...really good stuff!

Catherine listens along to the music while Melanie knits in a rocking chair. Perfect.

All in all, a really great weekend...

Volcanoes

2007-09-04T16:52:00.000-04:00

I found these words on my desk today. I haven't seen this paper in months, and today was the perfect day to find it. I share these words with you:

When women speak truly
they speak subversively--
they can't help it:
if you're underneath,
if you're kept down,
you break out,
you subvert.
We are volcanoes.
When we women offer
our experience as truth,
as human truth,
all the maps change.
There are new mountains.
That's all I want--
to hear you erupting.
You young Mount St. Helenses
who don't know the power in you--
I want to hear you.

~Ursula K. Le Guin

Happy Birthday, Lost in Louisville!

2007-09-01T11:42:00.000-04:00

In case you're wondering, 'Lost in Louisville' is still an accurate description...

Katrina

2007-08-29T13:54:00.000-04:00

Today is the two year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina making landfall in Louisiana. I was able to go to New Orleans in January. This is some quick footage that I took in the Lower 9th Ward. Except for the occassional car passing by, there was very little evidence of people living there. There was a strange silence in the the city the day we saw this.

I would write more here, but it seems overwhelming at this point to do so. Here are some thoughts from Michael Eric Dyson, author of "Come Hell or High Water: Hurricane Katrina and the Color of Disaster", when he was on the Tavis Smiley Show:

...FEMA's inability to understand first of all these people have been made vulnerable by an act of nature extended by an unnatural disaster called poverty, race, and class. And the inability of the administration to understand they must gird up their loins and speak, Tavis, to the brilliant speech that Mr. Bush gave in the aftermath of Katrina, when he stood in New Orleans and talked about the structural inequalities and the persistent poverty that this nation must somehow resolve.

That was a beautiful, uplifting, edifying speech that has since fallen on deaf ears in the administration. And certainly, FEMA's failure to provide for those folk is a manifestation of the collapse, the tragic collapse, of the Bush administration's commitment to those people who were the victims of Hurricane Katrina.

...because ironically and tragically enough, in the beginning of the twenty first century, we still occupy two parallel, though widely and vastly different universes of perception around race, as African-American people, generally speaking, and European-American White brothers and sisters, generally speaking.

The reality is, we looking at the same thing, but we ain't seeing the same picture. As the bible said, some heard thunder, some heard the voice of God. And depending upon where you're standing and where you are, you interpret the sounds differently. And African-American people who have been rendered vulnerable historically, exiled, forced into migrations that have instigated, of course, extraordinary developments in our culture.

But also mark the way in which we have been constantly a pilgrim people on the path toward expanding opportunity, but also forced there because of the inability of the government and the people of America and our citizens to understand our plight. That poll suggests that we still occupy two different world views, perspectives, outlooks.

My Life with Charlie

2007-08-27T22:56:00.000-04:00

I'm house and dog-sitting for a couple of weeks, which means I've spent more time with a dog in the past couple of days than I have in my entire life. I've decided to use this time to determine if I could ever have a dog for a pet and to generally grow in my love for them. This dog is named Charlie and is really quite smart. He follows my directions for the most part, and is able to tell me exactly what he needs by sitting in various places throughout the house. I'm generally curious of some of the other things he does though. For instance, he is currently laying on his back and moving around on the carpet. I don't understand why he's doing this, but I'm learning to trust that most all of what he does is normal dog behavior.

I'm planning to take him on a play date next week. It promises to be an exciting time for both of us. He'll get to hangout with other dogs and I'll get to be known as the random person who took care of him for a couple of weeks and took him to the dog park. I'm pretty sure he's going to remember me the rest of his life. We're best friends now.

Compulsion

2007-08-24T08:07:00.000-04:00

There are a few things that I realize I feel a compulsion to do. I find that the only thing that keeps me from doing any of these is either the knowledge that it could bring harm to others or that it is socially unacceptable. There are times when I have to constantly remind myself not to do these things, otherwise I might create some extremely awkward situations for myself. I thought I would share a few:

Pulling a fire alarm. Any fire alarm. I just want to see if the alarm really does spray ink on the person who pulls it. I think whoever told me that was lying.
Yelling at that man who was slurping his drink at the coffee shop. I was in a bad mood and had very little patience for noise making while I was trying to work!
Throwing my computer on the ground when it won't work properly. Hardly anything makes me want to be violent like technology that is malfunctioning.
Pushing the seat in front of me on the airplane. I'm extremely claustrophobic. I think it should be against the law for people to recline while flying.
Throwing things over any balcony. Nearly everyday I imagine myself dropping water balloons on people and they never see it coming. It makes me happy to think about this.

I'll let you know if my efforts to not do these things ever fails me...

"Earrings" need a job

2007-08-21T16:45:00.000-04:00

A woman in my area refers to Kate and me as 'earrings'. She actually calls us this in Spanish, but she explains that, in her culture, it's how you refer to friends who are always together.

Today is Kate's last day here at work, and I'm obviously very sad about that. My position ends here next month...so all I can say is, "earrings need a job". We bring a lot of joy to a place, so if this is something you're in need of, just give us a call. Our main skills are throwing wild atrium parties and laughing. This is us hard at work:

Something completely crazy happened across the hall.

This place is amazing!

Baby Fish Mouth is Sweeping the Nation

2007-08-18T20:19:00.001-04:00

My friends and I have turned into some very serious game players. We participated in a Win, Lose or Draw fundraiser last night...rather, we participated in a fundraiser for the Multiple Sclerosis Foundation by playing Win Lose or Draw. We played under the name Team Baby Fish Mouth. We took our inspiration from the one and only 'When Harry Met Sally'. Check out this clip to refresh your memory.

When Catherine and I left our team had four points. In order to win you needed six. We left all of our hope in the hands of Kate and Rachel. They did not disappoint. They brought the win home with only a few seconds to spare. We got the news in a message from Kate: "Baby Fish Mouth wins, SUCKAHS!" It's one of the best messages I've ever received.

What will we take away from the night? 1) Our team t-shirts which we made the night before. My number? 80 Million. It's my favorite number and I've always wanted it on a jersey...a t-shirt with 'Baby Fish Mouth' on the front will do though! 2) We also come away with a nice gift certificate to California Pizza Kitchen. This group loves to eat at restaurants in mall parking lots, so we're in for a good time in the near future.

Strangers

2007-08-15T11:24:00.000-04:00

I have a few blocks to walk to work after I park. Almost everyday of the past few weeks I have past the same gentleman as I walk. He's always wearing his headphones, and so am I. Recently, we've started to wave to each other, and now we say "good morning". What's interesting is that we even do this if we pass on opposite sides of the road.

I think I feel caught between wanting to stop and talk with him or just letting our interactions continue on as they have been. I really want to ask him what he's listening to through those headphones, and I'm curious as to where he walks everyday. This past weekend, as I was driving home, I saw him walking several miles away from where I work.

In my head, we end up becoming best friends and we always tell people that the first month that we knew each other mainly consisted of waving at each other from across the street. It's a good story...

The Stars at Night

2007-08-13T23:55:00.000-04:00

I've taken to laying out on my porch the past few nights to watch the stars. It started with the recent meteor shower, which was really amazing. I ended up seeing a huge shooting star. I've seen many before but this one hardly seemed real.

I'm kind of disappointed that it's taken me nearly a year to discover the beauty of my porch. It is now my goal to utilize it as much as possible while I still live here. The whole thing is reminding me of laying on the tennis courts at camp. There was a river no more that 100 yards away. It's still one of my favorite places to be.

I can't help but think of the movie "American Tail" and the lyrics to 'Somewhere Out There':

Somewhere out there,
beneath the pale moonlight,
some one's thinking of me and loving me tonight.

Somewhere out there,
some one's saying a prayer,
that we'll find one another in that big somewhere out there.

And even though I know how very far apart we are,
it helps to think we might be wishing on the same bright star.

And when the night wind starts to sing a lonesome lullaby,
it helps to think we're sleeping underneath the same big sky.

Somewhere out there,
if love can see us through,
then we'll be together,
somewhere out there,
out where dreams come true.

Beautiful, isn't it?

A Two-Cut Year

2007-08-11T18:25:00.000-04:00

Let's be clear, haircut day is ALWAYS traumatic for me. A lot of self-talk is involved in getting myself into the chair. My main fear comes from a few horrifying experiences in the past. Everyone has these stories...that haircut, or two, that you'd just rather forget. As you recall them a certain amount of shame comes over you. Your only hope is that no one runs across the pictures that were taken of you during that time of your life. And, you know that this won't always be possible.

One of the worst experiences I've had in the chair occurred when I was seven or eight. My mother took me to get my hair cut and so my anxiety level was on the rise. Soon after I sat down all my fears were realized and because of what happened I will forever feel justifiably nervous before letting someone cut my hair. The stylist ended up cutting part of my ear. MY EAR! I began to cry and ran into the bathroom to be alone. To make matters worse I ended up stubbing my toe on the way into the restroom, which pretty much made me feel like the world was ending because someone thought it was a good idea to get my hair cut.

This is probably the reason that I only get my hair cut once a year now. I usually only get my hair cut in May right before summer gets underway. Since I've been living in Louisville I've noticed that my hair has been growing faster. This isn't happy news for me because it has meant needing to get my hair cut twice since I've been here. I just had to get it cut again. I'm hoping that cutting my hair four inches this time will buy me a little more time before having to face the dreaded chair again...

Heat Wave

2007-08-08T01:13:00.001-04:00

It's August and that means it's been a little warm outside. What I've gathered is that it's been more hot than usual here. The locals seem to be suffering quite a bit. I find that I'm quite comfortable out in the heat. It's all my training from growing up in Texas. What amazes me is all the people who seem to think that southeast Texas isn't humid. People, it's like living in a bowl of soup down there. It's not pleasant, but part of me really loves it.

Every time I hear the words "heat wave" I am taken back to the 7th grade. I was in PE class and for whatever reason we were learning about rhythmic something-or-others. What was the point? I have no idea. All I know is that I was in my standard issue gray t-shirt and shorts, you know the kind, and was handed two wooden batons. There was a remarkable drawing of a knight on the front. We were the knights and "our spirit never died" (yeah, I remember the school song).

We had to position ourselves on the floor to tap out the beat to Martha and the Vandellas "Heatwave". Imagine a bunch of 7th graders, most already struggling with the awkwardness of that age, and then being forced to dress exactly alike in polyester shorts and tap out beats to a song they've never heard but their gym coaches seemed to be enjoying. I spent most of my time going back and forth from wanting to make eye contact with my classmates to connect our collective suffering, and avoiding any kind of recognition that there were other people in the room witnessing this part of my adolescence. When we got more advanced they graduated us to using blue plastic plates. I believe this added a level of spirit to our performance that the wooden batons were not allowing us to tap into.

We Were Robbed

2007-08-07T08:30:00.001-04:00

Trivia Update:

'The Hoopla' is amazing. Here's the scene: We're going into the final question in 5th place. This is familiar territory for us. We're a come-from-behind-team.

The final question? Give the combined aged for David Crosby, Stephen Stills, Graham Nash, and Neil Young (within five years).

Now, there was much deliberation and some serious use of our math skills. We finally landed on the number 256. There was also the possibility of getting an extra bonus point if we could name the eldest of them all. And, I am happy to report that we received every possible point available to us on this question. Amazing! This is the first time we answered the final question right!

We were on an emotional high at this point. We felt unstoppable. The past few months of trivia had all been practice for this moment. This is the moment where we would crush every other opponent. They would be embarrassed to face us outside as they walked to their cars. We had this...

He announced third place--we knew we had more points. He announced second--we knew we had more points. This was the moment! He announced that the winning team had answered everything correctly and had wagered every point possible (US!), and then he announced 'The Hoopla' as the evening's first place team. It was a beautiful moment. I felt like I had a purpose in this life--to play trivia on Mondays and win.

Then we heard the two most hated words in trivia: SCORING DISCREPANCY. The announcer apologized and was embarrassed, but it was meaningless to us. We were resigned to being a second place team now...our winnings cut in half. This is extremely painful if just 30 seconds earlier you had determined dominating in a game of random questions and knowledge was the reason for your living.

I don't know how long it will take me to move past all of this. I want to believe I'll be my old self next week, but I know this is mostly wishful thinking.

Church Signs

2007-08-05T08:29:00.000-04:00

If you're not paying attention, you're probably missing out on some of the genius that are church sign messages. A recent sighting has inspired me to share some of these with you. The sign? "God reads all knee-mail". Genius.

Here are some signs that I remember or have looked up to share with you. And, to be clear, I am not endorsing any of these. I think some are interesting and want to meet the people that came up with them, and others are in no way anything that I would ever think or say. Many of these make me completely uncomfortable. I do, however, enjoy reading these short messages and thinking about what it can tell me about that particular community. Enjoy!

What's missing here at C-H-_-_-C-H?
Free Love 4 U
Accepting Rejected Stones
Make your eternal reservations now. 'Smoking' or 'Non-Smoking'?
Don't be God's weakest link!
Everyone can afford to give away a smile!
We help because we have been helped!
Jesus died for 'myspace' in heaven
Life is like tennis--the one who serves most seldom loses!
Wal-Mart isn't the only saving place

Please share others! Also, do you think I could get a job making these up? Seriously, I need a job...

The Big Screen

2007-08-03T08:58:00.000-04:00

I was recently asked to pick out a selection of videos for a movie night. This gives me the chance to share 20 movies I think you should see if you haven't. These aren't necessarily the best ones out there, but they are some of my favorites. Happy watching!

The Game
Clue
Dancer Texas, Pop. 81
12 Angry Men
Three Amigos
American History X
Ernest Goes to Camp
Stepmom (Why do I cry every time?)
Boys on the Side
Primal Fear (Eek! I just got chills!)
Boyz 'N the Hood
City of God
Harry and the Hendersons
Amores Perros
Donnie Darko
Dirty Dancing (I have, in fact, carried a watermelon.)
Troop Beverly Hills
Beaches
The 'Burbs (Honestly, this movie still scares me a little.)
Pee-Wee's Big Adventure

What are your favorites?

Flight 4023 is cancelled

2007-07-30T23:22:00.000-04:00

Fun times at the airport with Jen and me...

It was supposed to be my final day of travel, but it turned into one of the most miserable days of my life. We arrived at the airport early (so excited to get home!) and decided to have lunch as we waited for our flights. It began to rain as we ate, and there was plenty of thunder and lighting that came along with it. It's amazing how hopeful I can be in these moments, even when there is little reason to believe flight schedules won't be affected by the massive thunderstorm outside. Just keeping hoping...

It was time to move towards our gate, and the delays began as soon as we reached it. Ten-minute delays turn into thirty-minute ones, and it gets worse from there. Almost immediately after the delays start there is a massive build up of people, and everyone works on displaying their craziness. It's like people have been storing up socially inappropriate behavior for months to use on just such an occasion as this. And, it's not just the passengers (or potential passengers), but also the airline representatives.

The line at "Special Services" was 200 people deep. Yeah, really special... My only hope for the day was that I would make the file footage on CNN Headline News as they reported "major flight delays and cancellations at National Airport".

This particular gate has escalators that lead down to a loading dock where passengers board shuttles and are then taken to their plane. Apparently it's not a hangout spot. Over the course of my 7 hour stay at this particular gate, I heard several workers scream, "We are not boarding any flights! The loading dock is for boarding only!", no less that 200 times over the intercom. First, there is no need to scream over an intercom. Second, how about roping off the area to help out those passengers who just can seem to follow directions? This would have saved all of us some trouble and frustration.

I did have a great appreciation for one worker who took the sarcastic and humorous approach. He announced that one flight would actually be taking off, and began by saying, "Folks, all is not lost. All is not lost! This is the moment we've all been waiting for! A plane is actually going to leave this airport tonight!" It was an exciting moment for sure...

Two hours later my flight was finally cancelled. My friends had already headed back to where we were staying...or so I thought. They were actually stuck in baggage claim waiting for bags that took ours to show up. I decided not to wait for mine and it actually beat me back to Louisville. I'm still working through some resentment against it.

Jen got her bag back after 3 hours. We celebrated appropriately!

R.I.P. Mexican Food

2007-07-29T00:37:00.000-04:00

I can report that I have had decent Mexican food in DC, but the margaritas were probably most of the attraction. Good Mexican food is not something I've had a lot of access to since I've been in Louisville. This has been a difficult reality for me to accept. Lately, I've found a couple of places that will get me by until the next time I can get to Texas--where I can count on any number of places to provide me with exactly what I'm looking for.

As I've said, the situation here is pretty bad. Ladies and gentlemen, let's look at EXHIBIT A from one of the popular "Mexican" food restaurants here in town. The following is a section found on their menu:

Description of Mexican Foods

Tacos: tortillas folded and fried into crispy shell, filled with beef, cheese and lettuce.

Chorizo: Mexican sausage. Pork meat, red dried pepper and other spices.

Frijoles refritos: refried beans

Nachos: tortilla chips with melted cheese on top

Tortillas: thin corn or flour pancakes used as a base for many dishes

Burrito: flour tortilla rolled around with your choice of filling and topped with cheese and red sauce

Special Burrito: same as above with the addition of lettuce, tomato and guacamole.

The first time I saw this I wanted to move home. I really don't know what I want to say here except, "thin corn or flour pancakes?!?"

MARKER

2007-07-28T19:20:00.000-04:00

A walk around Washington, DC, included a couple of very cool findings. The first was lunch at Busboys and Poets. I recommend the veggie burger. They make their own and they use lentils. Really good stuff. Also, the water is pretty good. I had seven glasses for fear of death from dehydration. (I'm very dramatic.)

The wall at Busboys and Poets

The second finding was something we just happened to come across while walking down the street. We were handed a card that had the following printed on it:

MARKER

A performance by Mary Coble

Saturday, July 28th from 2-5 @ U Street/Cardoza Metro

You are invited to write on the artist's body derogatory words that have been used against you or slurs that you have used or heard used against others.

Coble anticipates that the act of marking another person will elicit emotional discomfort for both artist and participant. By granting permission to express these terms on her body, the artist hopes this act will engender a larger community of people assisting in collective history of the 'reclaiming' of hateful speech.

Most of our group participated...

Artist, Mary Coble.

Mertz 812

2007-07-26T14:06:00.000-04:00

Another trip to Washington, DC, means I'm staying in a college dormitory. This immediately brought me back to my days of dorm living. Yes, this dorm smells like corn chips, just like every other dorm in America. I think this is the smell that is generated by community showers, not sleeping enough, sleeping too much, and laundry that hasn't been done in weeks.

I still have a great deal of affection for my first dorm room. My parents moved me to Chicago over the course of two days. We made the move in a van that was completely packed, and mostly with items that were never used over the course of my first year. I thought I needed to bring everything I owned. (I also packed too much for this trip.) That first year I lived on the 8th floor of a 19-story building. My roommate and I had the smallest room on the entire floor. We had to keep our beds bunked because there was no room to have it otherwise. I feel like I dealt with this a lot better than I ever would now. Today, the thought of sharing that space with another person makes me a little crazy.

Most of that year I felt like I was participating in an experiment to see how people react the first time they don't have an authority figure telling them what they can and can't do. I spent a significant amount of my time observing the other subjects. My roommate and I became fast friends and used our time together to judge the rest of our floormates. They seemed to be in a strange competition related to alcohol consumption, and never appeared to be winning any of their matches. I probably should have helped them in someway, but I was more concerned with how amazing the sun looked as it set on our campus chapel...still one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen.

College. Good times.

If it's Monday...

2007-07-23T23:37:00.000-04:00

...then it's time for TRIVIA!

My friends and I have been playing trivia at a local pub for the past few months. We have placed once during this time, but that isn't the point. (I have to tell myself this isn't the point every week.) It's amazing how hopeful I am every week, too. Every time I go in there I believe it will be the week that we come away with a first place victory. This has never happened. At our best, we seem to be a 4th Place team, and I'm learning to accept this...

The is especially important because what I seem to contribute to the group is my ability to organize our scoring sheet. Seriously, I may only be helpful to the team for one question throughout an entire game. Most everyone else at the table has a category they seem to excel in...I am not one of those people. I did, however, develop the method by which we record the answers we submit and the points that we wagered. What this means is that I was the most help to my group for five minutes sometime during the month of April. Fantastic!

We play under the name, "The Hoopla", because we built this city on rock and roll. We're the hoolpa and everyone else is just knee deep in it...

Some of the team, from left to right: Lee (music lyrics and all things pop culture), Catherine (looks like she's digging into the depths of her mind for the answers, but is literally thinking up ways to get away with murder), Rachel (geography, math, computers. If she wasn't on our team we would be trying to recruit her from the table next to us), Me, Kate (words and literature), and Kelly (trees, birds, covered bridges, types of moss and shapes of clouds). NOT PICTURED: J (James Bond movies, Indiana and anything of interest to a 12-year-old boy), Molly (the newest addition to our team who we hope is holding all the knowledge we don't...)

Sick Day

2007-07-18T16:29:00.000-04:00

I don't get sick very often; I've been pretty blessed that way. I usually get a really bad cold during the month of July for some reason. I've never been able to figure out what all of that is about, but it almost always happens. Honestly, I become a fairly miserable person when I'm sick, and for the most part this is because I refuse to acknowledge that I'm not feeling well and act accordingly. Part of me really believes that my mind can simply will the rest of my body to be well. This doesn't always work.

Currently, I'm fortunate enough to have a job that allows me to take the day off if I'm sick. I have recently taken the day off for just such a reason and find that I spend most of these days the same way. I still wake up early and engage in a lot of self-talk about whether or not I'm actually going to take the day off. This can sometimes take up to an hour for a decision to be reached. Once I'm able to tell myself it's not the end of the world if I'm not in the office, I'm able to make the call to my supervisor.

I then spend several hours falling in and out of sleep, and using my time awake to watch television. I am amazed that daytime television has not changed in the past 10 years. I'm certain that the same commercials, talk shows and soap operas are on everyday...just a little good news for those who love The Montel Williams Show and The Maury Povich Show.

And, because any good sick day should include soup, I make sure I'm able to get some at some point. It been especially important for me now because I've been obsessed with soup after these past few weeks of travel. At this point I'll take anything that's not served in a conference cafeteria or a hotel restaurant. The food served there is probably part of the reason I ended up sick in the first place.

Humiliation

2007-07-17T13:55:00.000-04:00

Recently, I had a pretty humiliating experience. It has had me thinking about how we deal with humiliation when it comes our way. Most of us have to deal with it at one point or another. It's one of those difficult facts of life. Perhaps the hardest part of any humiliating experience is our desire to not have anyone know what has happened to us. This can be counterproductive to working through the emotions that arise out of such experiences.

I am finding that true humiliation is closely tied to shame, which leaves us questioning our worth as a person. My initial response to this situation was to reduce myself to one thing--to one aspect of myself--and I am left trying to remember all of who I am...my whole self. This has been the greatest challenge.

I am grateful for the people I have been able to talk to about this, and I think this kind of support is some of the best we can give to each other. If humiliating experiences are a given, then love and care from those around us may be the most for which we can hope.

There's no place like home!

2007-07-16T12:46:00.000-04:00

I'm finally home and find myself torn between wanting to see everyone that I've missed and locking myself in my bedroom for several days. When you're traveling it seems you have very little time that is just yours. I've had three weeks of almost constant interactions with other people, and no real time to myself. This is a difficult thing for an introvert. It means I've had no time to build my energy back up. I'm done. Completely exhausted.

I've missed normal routine and regular interactions with people that I know. I noticed at some point this past week that I was no longer interested in meeting new people and was avoiding doing so at all cost. There were probably many interactions where I was coming across as rude. In the interest of self-preservation, I had to get over this and just accept what I was capable of giving to people. And, I probably won't have to see most of those people ever again, so, it's probably not the end of the world. OK, back to enjoying my own bed...I have slept in 9 different beds in the past three weeks. Unacceptable.

Where everybody knows your room number

2007-07-14T11:51:00.000-04:00

View of the hotel patio which has become my backyard...

It's my seventh day in this hotel. I am now well known throughout this place. The people who work here know my name and my room number. They know that I'm a vegetarian. They know that, at least for this week, I'm drinking coffee and water at breakfast, and that I take lemon in my water and soda.

I will say that the people that work her are extremely nice. I always wonder about this. I imagine that waiting on people all day long must take an emotional toll on workers, but the nature of their job is such that they must put on a happy face. I have realized that I have very little ability to do this when I have worked different jobs in the past. Seriously, I have the worst poker face when it comes to these things.

I'm extremely excited to be going home tomorrow, though I think the staff here will be missing me. Jose said he hoped it wouldn't be too long until I came back. I think I'm just looking forward to hearing my friends say "welcome back!" instead of the hotel restaurant staff who have seen me for most of my meals over the past week. Let me out!

Olvera Street

2007-07-13T22:39:00.000-04:00

The most I could hope for today was that someone, anyone would come rescue me from this hotel. My hopes were exceeded when my aunt, uncle, and cousin picked me up for dinner. They live in Escondido and made the drive up to Los Angeles to have dinner with me. How great is that?!? The only requirement for the evening was for Mexican food to be present, and I was not disappointed. After some discussion we decided to go to Olvera Street in Downtown LA. I've been there before with my family. My aunt reminded me of the picture we took with the burro when I was a child. I'm choosing to not remember that moment in my life...

I really enjoy Olvera Street. I recommend stopping by there if you find yourself in LA. There's great food and music. We were able to here the mariachis from another restaurant while we were eating our dinner. There are only a few things I enjoy more than this. I also bought the Loteria from one of the vendors...well, my aunt bought it for me. Not sure at this point if I'm going to be playing it or using it for a craft. I love the images.

This was exactly the kind of evening I needed. Amazing family, good food and good music. I'm always happy to spend time with my family, and it holds even more significance because it seems to happen less and less these days. I'll carry this evening with me until I'm able to see them again...

The Getty

2007-07-12T18:52:00.000-04:00

Rebar trellises! Genius!

I finally got out of the hotel. One of my committee members took another co-worker and me to the The Getty Museum today, and it was amazing! There was tons of sunlight which I was able to enjoy because we spent much of our time outside. We ate lunch outside and looked at the ocean. I need more days like this one.

I'd say go and enjoy the art, but that's not the best part... The most amazing part about The Getty is the garden. You need to see this garden. You need to see the rebar trellises!! I was completely fascinated with these things. What a great idea! They are huge and spectacular! Being outside lifted my spirits a great deal, and I now believe I've fallen into a depression after re-entering the hotel. I need more sun!

The Great Outdoors

2007-07-11T21:45:00.000-04:00

Palm trees from a distance...sadness.

I arrived in Los Angeles from North Carolina on Sunday and since that time I have been locked away in the basement of an airport hotel. OK, maybe not locked away, but if feels that way. I'm in LA this week for a meeting and conference. I will tell you that it seems completely tragic to be in LA where there is a lot of sunshine outside, and not having the opportunity to enjoy any of it. This is the thing about traveling for work, you can completely forget what city you're in because you aren't actually seeing that city...you're seeing a very nice hotel meeting room all day long.

Today was my first opportunity to go outside and I have to admit that I was a little apprehensive to do so. I was afraid the sun would burn my eyes...it's been so long since I've seen it. Thankfully, I have a couple of friends who got into town today and were able to accompany outside, you know, for moral support. I am happy to report that I survived the outing and the outside world has continued on without me the past couple of days. I will now have to take matters into my own hands the rest of the week and make outside time a priority. It's the only way I'm going to make it!

My Superhero Self

2007-07-08T07:41:00.000-04:00

Two nights ago I had a conversation with a few other people, and one woman told me about a concept her friend had shared with her. She said that sometimes it's helpful to think about what our superhero self would do, especially in those moments when we're not feeling entirely confident. This has had me thinking about who my superhero self is and what she would do. We agreed that our superhero self is just another part of us that already exist, probably our more confident, assured self.

Here's some of who I think my superhero self:

Lives by the lyrics to Tracy Chapman's "Tell It Like It Is"
Shares her thoughts earlier
Conducts less self-talk and just acts
Expresses excitement openly
Admits when I'm wrong
Would probably be less hesitant to come up with this list...

My superhero self does all the things I envision myself following through with in my head. Who is yours?

From where I'm sitting

2007-07-07T07:41:00.004-04:00

The truth is I'd rather be home in my own room and in my own bed. That can't happen though because I'm traveling for work. If I were at home though, I wouldn't be able to see this out my window. I've kept the window to my room open the entire week. The weather has been amazing here and fresh air instead of air conditioning is always preferable. Yeah, don't feel too bad for me...

Awkward...

2007-07-06T07:41:00.000-04:00

I've learned something new, and I think you're going to find it useful. Some very nice people have exposed me to a new communication tool that I'm going to star using. This tool is used to communicate the awkwardness that can occur during regular conversation. It's for use during those times when you have no idea what to say.

Here's how it works, so you can use it, too.

This is a turtle. Place one hand over the other with your thumbs out. Then move your thumbs forward in a circular motion.

This is a clam. This is the next stage in awkwardness. Just move your hands up and down making this shape.

This is a squid...well, Whitney demonstrating a squid. It's a simple hand over the face with some attack motions for dramatic affect.

The final stage of awkwardness is the collar pull and "yikes!" face. Use this one wisely!

Celebrate (without any meat)!

2007-07-05T08:36:00.000-04:00

Today marks eleven years that I have been a vegetarian! It started out as a bet between my brother and me to see if we could make it a month without meat. I will say that he couldn't make it through an entire day! So, I guess I am the official winner of that competition. What amazes me is that eleven years later there are still many of the same difficulties of being a vegetarian...especially when you travel. Vegetarian does not mean: needs no protein. If you're considering doing the vegetarian thing and are traveling, all I can suggest is making sure you get eggs in the morning. This will be your best bet for protein, in many places, all day long! Seriously, it may be your only opportunity. I have been grateful for being in Louisville where there are many options for vegetarian dining. This definitely isn't the case in all areas. Austin is another good place. Stop by Veggie Heaven if you're ever in Texas.

Church Camp All-Star

2007-07-04T07:40:00.000-04:00

I'm at a conference this week for work, and as soon as I arrived it reminded me of church camp. It had me thinking that even though it's been awhile since I've been to church camp, I'm really familiar with the process. Here's what you can expect should you find yourself in this environment:

1) Energizers. This is how camp leaders will get you going in the morning. Energizers are organized movement (I don't know that I'd always call it dancing) to different songs. Most of these are songs you would not run across in your daily life, so this will probably be the only time you encounter these songs. Enjoy! Oh, if you aren't a morning person, you will end up hating the people around you...just be prepared for the negative feelings you may develop towards your best friend.

2) Um, the praise music. It's my belief that people either love or hate the stuff. If it's for you, this week is going to be awesome. If not, you have two options: go home now! or go into extreme sarcasm mode. If you choose to stick around, then here's what the sarcastic approach can look like. You need to begin to act like the music is really speaking to you. Begin to sing louder than everyone around you. The people around you will wonder if you're doing this to be a jerk, but because of the nature of the music they will be forced to consider that you are really being moved by the spirit. Watching your fellow campers sort through all of this in their heads is your reward for having to sit though "Change My Heart, Oh God".

3) Food. Here's what you need to know. No matter how good the food is at any one camp, at the end of the day it's still camp food. You cannot get away from this fact. There are a variety things to eat in the cafeteria, but you will discover that everything begins to taste like everything else by day three. Take it easy. Many of the finest church camp goers out there have become sick at some point during the week. It's perfectly normal if it happens to you.

4) Small groups. If you're doing leadership, you have been charged with making these campers have the best week possible. If they are going to be "changed forever", it's pretty much in your hands. This is no easy task. You have to make everyone feel special, make everyone feel like what they have to say is important. And, let's be honest, this isn't always the case. It just isn't. Sometimes you'll find yourself wondering what the hell someone is talking about, but just push through. Nod your head. Give an affirming look. This will work for most people. Oh, if you feel super inspired, invite your group to eat a meal together. This will let the other small groups know that you have been more successful at bonding than they have. It is a competition, after all.

5) What to do if you've been asked to be in a skit... Look, skits happen. That's a part of the church camp life. Accept this fact and you are more likely to survive your time there. If you're asked to participate, give yourself over to the process. Do not fight it. If you fight it, you'll spend most of the week feeling completely humiliated, and it'll be impossible to enjoy making fun of other campers and presenters...And, that would be, well, a huge loss on your part.

Please feel free to email me if you need any more advice about how to make it through a church camp situation. I have a lot of advice to offer. I'm here to serve.

What's on the radio?

2007-07-02T21:24:00.000-04:00

I had to drive from Louisville to Asheville, North Carolina by myself today. I was supposed to drive with another person but they had to cancel at the last minute. I was extremely tired on the drive down and needed to keep myself away with some music. What I quickly realized is that once you get east of Louisville radio reception is pretty awful. In total, I think I heard no more that twenty complete songs on my trip. Oh, I should say that this count excludes all Christian music and preaching. For real. I can't handle it.

Here's some of what I heard (OK, I was bored. There was no one to talk to so I wrote some things down...)

Amy Winehouse, Rehab
Rocco Deluca & The Burden, Colorful
Jethro Tull, Aqualung
The Doors, Who Do You Love
Jack Johnson, Flake
Randy Travis, Forever and Ever Amen
Spoon, Finer Feelings
Candyman, Knockin' Boots
Roxette, It Must Have Been Love
Jame Blunt, So Long Jimmy
Carole King, I Feel the Earth Move
Ray Charles, Crying Time

I'd like to thank the public radio station in Lexington...or was it Knoxville? One of these gave me the best opportunity to hear some music.

a serene place to be...

2007-07-01T13:21:00.000-04:00

Serenbe is a community outside of Atlanta where some of Kate's family lives. They were kind enough to put us up for the night on Friday. Kate worked on a farm out there last summer and so she showed me around on Saturday.

The Blue Eyed Daisy...let me suggest the grits and a biscuit with elderberry jam.

This is Buckshot. They won't let him be around the other goats. That's probably because he isn't very nice and won't pose for pictures. I'm still bitter.

I hope you can see the shape of these flowers. They're all the same kind, but in different stages of opening. Check the one that shaped like a star. Incredible. We checked this out for nearly half an hour.

I'll spare you all the shots of us trying to get a picture along this path. This was take five. Neither Kate or I are very skilled at using the self-timer on the camera. It's sad.

We spent most of the day just being quiet, which I've discovered can still happen if you're talking or if there are lots of things happening around you. After a long week at the Social Forum, this was exactly the type of space I needed.

Forum Lessons Learned

2007-06-29T20:57:00.000-04:00

This is what I learned at the 2007 US Social Forum:

Activists love paper...be on guard, they will use their special skills to get that paper into your hands
They also love buttons and t-shirts
Composting in your backpack is possible, but be prepared for the smell
You can make a strong argument that the United States Guest Worker Program is the equivalent of modern day slavery
Listening to people talk about what they oppose all day, instead of what they stand for, will get annoying rather quickly
Carry deodorant in your backpack
You can't do everything. Let it go.
People in Atlanta show great hospitality
3 two-hour workshops in a day is too much for one brain to handle
Just because you do something that most people don't do, doesn't make it radical...

It's Too Hot. It's Too Humid. USSF 2007

2007-06-27T23:33:00.000-04:00

The US Social Forum 2007 started with a march. There is hardly anything to say about it except it was 10,000 people calling for another U.S. There wasn't enough water and an overabundance of heat. I mean, it's Atlanta and it's the summer. This was about the only thing I could count on for the week!

Left: Kate and me at some point during the march. Right: Two of our amazing hosts for the week, Leticia and Rachel...Thanks, Ladies.

Do you have a minute?

2007-06-26T16:50:00.000-04:00

We were supposed to leave the building by 4pm. We were supposed to make a quick trip to the store and head out of town...be on our way to Atlanta no later than 5pm. This isn't how it happened.

Now, we were ready to leave work by 4 o'clock. We were probably a little too proud of that fact. I got a call right as we were going to leave my cube. "This is Tiffany...Yes, I do have a minute...Yes, I will bring Kate with me..." What happened was one of those bizarre work experiences that you probably would see on 'The Office'. There was explaining, laughter, defensiveness, apologies, anger, tears, and hugs all around. We were behind schedule and the start to our trip wasn't going as planned.

When we walked outside, Kate had a parking ticket on her car. This could be a sign. Her battery was dead. This was a sign. As we walked to get my car, the meter maid informed Kate that he could give her another ticket for keeping her car parked there. After we explained that the battery was dead he said, "Well, if I see a tow truck I'll tell them not to take it." This was the best thing that happened to either of us all afternoon. Sadness. After a few attempts we were able to get her car going and we were on our way...to doing several errands before we could leave. Grocery store. Coffee. Oil Change. Getting gas. Borrowing Kelly's ice chest, cutting board, knife and water bottle.

We were able to leave Louisville at 6:30... Not at all according to our plans. This put us in Atlanta at nearly 1am. This was the start of the 2007 (1st ever) US Social Forum...

Tie-ing it all together

2007-06-25T15:38:00.001-04:00

I was recently taught how to tie my own tie! Carol made a lifelong goal of my become a reality. What I realized is that growing up I was given those messages that most young girls are given about what they can and cannot wear...a tie being something you can't wear. So, I've finally had the opportunity to learn to tie a tie and it was another woman who taught me! I will say that I was a quick study and picked it up right away. See for yourself!!!

Hit the road, Tiff!

2007-06-25T15:25:00.000-04:00

It started when I went to Texas...my Summer of Travel, that is. I've been back in Louisville all of 5 1/2 days and will pretty much be gone for three weeks (except for this coming Sunday). I'm really nervous about all the travel, mainly the being away from the office and the rest of my life for that long. I'm not sure what the next few weeks will bring, but I hope to have good things to report when I'm back. I'm sure I'll be writing to you along the way.

This stretch of travel includes trips to Atlanta, North Carolina and Los Angeles. The map search I just conducted tells me that is a total of 5,617 miles in 21 days. I just hope I make it!

OK, I have to get out of here...

time passes quickly

2007-06-16T23:01:00.000-04:00

I spent time with family today. I immediately realized that I haven't seen a lot of them in some time. This was hard for me to face. I know that Louisville is a good place for me right now, but what I love about Texas is mainly my family. Experiences and opportunities have taken me away from here at different times, but it comes with a trade-off. I miss many things, and so anytime I get to have around them is important, needed and meaningful.

Left: My Tia Tina. One of my favorite people in the world... Right: Uncle Joe, Aunt Cindy, Aunt Mona, Uncle Ralph. My Uncle Joe believes the Cowboys will do better this year because Tony Romo is no longer dating Carrie Underwood. He called her a name that I will not repeat here, but he wanted to make sure his opinion was known.

Left: My cousin, Kristen. It was her graduation party that brought everyone together. Congratulations! Right: Um, my father was already acting strange before we arrived at the party. My brother caught this shot of my father making some kind of weird face.

All in all, it was a good night with family and I was happy to have the chance to see everyone.

Virtual Road Trips

2007-06-15T22:39:00.000-04:00

Something has become quite apparent to me. Adult children should not take road trips with their parents. It's not healthy. It's not natural. For anyone. I'm traveling with my parents to see family. Today's travel included a four hour drive to Corpus Christi. There was more rain at the start of our drive, but it cleared up after a little while and it ended up being a nice day outside.

You're most likely to run into problems when it comes to listening preferences. My father is a talk radio type person, and I definitely try to avoid it at all cost. He tried to convince me to listen to whatever show he was tuned into, but I refused. I was saved by my iPod and a few episodes of 'This American Life' of which I had yet to listen. I recommend a similar plan of action if you are ever in this situation.

Now, you won't be able to avoid all potentially stressful, confusing exchanges. Your parents may be extremely skilled at creating situations that "require" your attention. You're tired. Your defenses will be down. You won't be able to see it coming. Be gentle with yourself. It happens to the best of us.

I was roped into listening to 30 seconds of that talk show. Definitely enough for my taste. My father tried to get me to discuss the legitimacy of what the caller and host were talking about. It's amazing how the smallest exposure to this type of thing will get your blood pressure up. Retreat to your headphones as soon as possible.

My parents stopped at a fast food place and my father started talking about how one day we would probably be able to buy "virtual meals". As I write this I still have no idea what he could have been talking about. There was something about being able to buy the smell of a meal, and everyone being happy with that. I'm not sure if he really believes this is where we're really headed (or why we would go there), and I didn't ask him.

Maybe one day we'll be able to purchase virtual road trips. I imagine we'd be able to upload those to our iPods and take the trip at our leisure. And, if you don't care for certain parts, you can fast forward through it, or turn down the volume. I think that'll sell.

It's raining! It's pouring! I'm happy!

2007-06-14T22:46:00.000-04:00

This trip home is mainly focused on seeing family, but I was able to have some time with one of my closest friends today. Sarah and I have been planning our day together since I knew I was coming to Texas. The most important part of the day was simply to have face-to-face catch up time. As great as time over the phone can be, it's never as good as actually seeing each other. Sarah and I had dinner together (let me suggest Berry Hill Baja Grill if you're ever in the Houston area...the salsa is amazing, you can literally drink it!) and stayed there exactly 7 minutes too long...

It began to rain. When it's raining this hard, it's completely useless to try and devise a plan to stay dry getting to the car. It's pointless! We laughed so hard once we were finally in the car. It seemed that water was coming from everywhere. What's amazing is that massive thunderstorms like this are regular occurrences for this part of Texas during the summer. It looked like the world was ending. And, I loved it! I only wish it would rain like this in Louisville...

Room Randomness

2007-06-13T23:00:00.000-04:00

Currently, I am sitting in the room in which I grew up. Every time I come back here it looks less and less like a place I would live...or even a place I ever did. There are some items in this room that I would be extremely embarrassed if most of the people in my life today could see. I guess I could explain some of them, but I won't. Here are some random items for you to think about:

Not one, but two bears made at Build-A-Bear Workshop
Stainless steel coffee mug
Plastic purple piggy bank
Road atlas
Unopened 3-pack of lipstick
Yellow rubber cleaning gloves
A copy of 'Precious Moments Bedtime Stories'
Picture of Troy Aikman
Application manuals for Word, Excel, Access, PowerPoint (the 2000 version)
Rain stick bought in Mexico
Play tea set (for 4)
Rotating night light (I think it's supposed to project images onto the wall)
Several bottles of acrylic paint
"Handy for President" button (that's right, a smurf...for president!)
Precious Moments rotating figurine that plays "Just like me, they long to be close to you..."

I'm sure there's more. I'll make additions as I come across them.

My homes...

2007-06-12T16:10:00.000-04:00

I'm going to Texas today to visit with family. I'll be gone for a week. I have been both sad to have time away from Louisville (never thought that would happen), and also excited to see family back home. I don't have much to say about any of this, only that it's nice to feel like I have two homes, two places to be. And, I'm happy that I don't have to separate those experiences...

Oh, baby!

2007-06-11T13:50:00.000-04:00

On Saturday I got to hangout with a new, very good friend of mine. He's six-and-a-half months old and we've become fast friends since his first day here with us...you know, on the Earth... Not too long ago I was having a pretty bad week, but spending some time with him really helped me make it. I was over at his house and stuck my hand in his playpen. He grabbed my forearm with both hands and then nuzzled his face in my arm. Once in awhile he would look up at me and smile and laugh. Amazing.

So, we spent the day together (his mom was there, too...also a good friend) at the farmer's market and then looking for good Mexican stores and food. We went down Preston Highway and found a store where you could buy lots of Mexican cheeses, fruits, vegetables and other goods (including some pretty good looking corn tortillas...flour tortillas may be too much to ask for in this city--the verdict is still out on that one). Then we went next door to a panaderia (a bread store/bakery). They were selling lots of pan dulce (sweet breads), and while I don't eat that stuff anymore, I was able to buy some for my friends to share...just as good!

We then made our way over to southern Indiana, what Rachel calls the "sunny side of Louisville", and ate at a pretty good Mexican restaurant/store. I recommend the sauce provided at the table.

On the way back over the river, my friend was making himself perfectly happy in his car seat by moving his body and head back and forth and laughing. He's also discovered how to stick his tongue out! After ten minutes of this he wore himself out and fell asleep. I need his approach to life...make yourself so happy you have to go to sleep because you just can't handle it anymore. That's a beautiful thing!

Full Count

2007-06-06T07:02:00.000-04:00

I went to my first Louisville Bats game last night. This was my first time to attend a minor league baseball game, and I must say that I enjoyed it quite a bit. A big thanks to Kelly for sharing her tickets. We had awesome seats behind home plate. I enjoyed the stadium because it's smaller and you feel close to the action. Unfortunately, the Bats lost, but that's OK because now we know all the team member's names and I plan on supporting them more often!

Note: The people in this stadium love to clap! Be prepared. Additionally, they sell fried bologna sandwiches. It's as scary as it sounds!

Let It Rain

2007-06-05T16:45:00.000-04:00

I've had an internal anxitey as of late. It hasn't been raining, and I've found that its been making me quite nervous. I've never experienced this before...never been quite this sensitive to it. This weekend it looked like it might rain, but very little fell. Today, I could see it coming out the window at work. I've been praying for it to happen. And, then it finally did at just the right time. When I saw it had started I had to go outside and really experience it. As soon as I opened the door to go outside I felt so much relief. I stood in it for awhile...and listened repeatedly to Tracy Chapman's 'Let It Rain'...

Let it rain
As I walk these streets unknown
To no one named
Not even myself
When I'm low

Let it go
No mother no father no home
Forget as all others
Have forgotten
When I'm alone

Let it come
Love that lifts me up
Pain that brings me down
Everything I'd ever want and don't
When I'm not strong

Let it rain
Let it flood these streets and wash me away
To where it makes no difference who I am
Or what the future holds
When I don't know

But give me hope
That help is coming
When I need it most
Give me hope
That help is coming
When I need it most

The non-local's very local day

2007-06-03T15:01:00.000-04:00

I had a very local day yesterday. I went to the Farmer's Market on Bardstown Road. Besides supporting some local farmers (always a good call), I went to show support for the omelets. Amazing! They are so good, in fact, that a friend and I altered our plans for this coming Saturday to accommodate a visit to the market. What a good friend to remind me that I'll be gone most of the summer and need to get in every visit possible!

I then made my way over to the Women in Transition yard sale. They are trying to raise money to send women to the US Social Forum being held in Atlanta later this month. I'm going and wanted to support other people's ability to go, as well. I will say that I came away with a little table to put my laptop on and the VHS version of Rounders (still haven't see it...)

After the yard sale, I went to the Louisville Free Public Library's Book Sale! I hope you won't think I'm a horrible person when I tell you that a few of the books I bought I intend to cut up. Does this make me a bad person? Look, the images found within the books were quite colorful and I know that I will be using them at some point for a crafting project. I'm sure the authors of those books wanted people to enjoy them, and hardly anything brings me as much joy as crafting! Yea! (Tiff, tone it down!)

I managed to go home and relax for a bit...always nice for a Saturday!

Then I made my way over the the Americana World Festival. There were lots of vendors and organizations representing different people from around the world. It was an all day event, but I was still surprised when I showed up in the evening and there were lots of people there. It was comforting to be in a place representing so many cultures in a city that so often appears overwhelmingly homogeneous.

And then it happened! I needed to fill an hour in my schedule and decided to eat dinner. I stopped at Santa Fe Mexican Grill on South 3rd Street. I'll tell you that I had very little hope for this experience as ALL the "Mexican food" I've tried in this town has been extremely disappointing. Santa Fe didn't start out any different. The chips and salsa were the WORST I'VE EVER HAD (even when compared to other Louisville spots). But, I will be returning to Santa Fe Mexican Grill. And, why is that? The enchiladas verdes. Hands down the best enchiladas I've had in this town. Anyone interested in going sometime just let me know, and bring your cash because they don't accept cards.

After a quick stop at Highland Coffee for an Italian soda, I went to the bar to see Carol, Laura and Liz do their thing on the guitar and with their voices. There was also harmonica playing and drumming on a stool. A great night!

These are all the ways I supported my local community in one great day...

My coffee like my women

2007-05-26T15:19:00.000-04:00

The following are highlights from a weekend conversation with my father. Before making any judgements about him, you should know that his mission in life is three-fold: to get me to express my opinion about anything, to make me uncomfortable with his references to pop culture, and to make me laugh out of pure confusion. Also, he's very good at this...

He called and asked me which movie he should rent (this is a frequent occurrence as I am a former Blockbuster team member...Love you, Summers 2000 and 2001). The three movies in the running? Babel, Apocalypto, and American Pie Band Camp (the one that went directly to video). He asked what the band camp movie would be about (as if the movie even had a plot). I informed him that it would most likely be teenagers talking about sex or having sex. Uncomfortable moment #1: He referred to this as "Kids getting funky"...and then pulled out the phrases "friends with benefits" and "bootycall". He then asked if 'rendezvous' is an appropriate synonym for "bootycall". He has been informed to never use this exact combination of words ever again. I think he hears these things by watching MTV. Parents, this will not help you connect with your children.

Moment #2: We then moved on to discussing 'The View' (one of his favorite subject matters). He reported that Al Sharpton and Donald Trump were being considered as new hosts to join the show. I'm sure this was supposed to be funny for some reason, but I was left completely confused.

His favorite topic this time of year is Father's Day. My father has informed me that he would like to have a concealed handgun licence for this day devoted to fathers. This was brought up so that I could go into my prepared speech on the use of firearms in our society. I had to inform him that I am quite certain, though not entirely sure, that you cannot purchase a gift certificate for this type of thing. Therefore, Papi, you can expect the book of your choosing...or some other item that when used for it's intended purpose will not bring harm to another individual.

Finally, he said he recently saw the movie 'Phat Girlz', which I believe is completely untrue. This gave him the opportunity to say his favorite line of all time: "I like my coffee like I like my women...black, hot and strong."

Ladies and Gentlemen, this is my father...(well, part of him anyway).

a little birdy

2007-05-22T17:27:00.000-04:00

When I was a child, family members would say to me, "A little birdy told me something..." Then they would continue with some bit of information they had learned about me or some other fascinating story they had heard that they thought I would enjoy. I always wondered where they heard the things they did. Now I know I had my parents to blame for most of it.

The past couple of weeks I've been thinking about this phrase as I've had a number of interactions with birds around town.

1) The bird at lunch. I've never really seen a bird approach people like this. It got really close to us and just looked at us. Someone gave her a piece of bread (she wouldn't eat any of my apple), and I swear she picked up every last crumb. After a few minutes she flew off.

2) The bird on the walk to work. Last week this bird (don't think I'm crazy) was following me on the street. It practically suspended itself in the air behind me. It kept doing this, and I became scared it was going to divebomb me. Looking back on it I think it was asking me for help. I can't decide what it needed help with, but I think that's it.

3) The birds and my car. Several birds in my neighborhood have developed a habit of flying in front of my car when I'm leaving for work in the morning. I can't figure out why this is happening , and I can only hope that no one gets hurt.

4) The bird at church. There was a bird outside church on Sunday. It had its face in the corner and was sitting on the ground. It scared me as it started to flap its wings suddenly. It looked like she was trying to climb the wall, and so I had to tell her that she can't climb brick walls. She turned towards me and gave me a blank stare. We'll probably become best friends.

Windshifts

2007-05-21T13:32:00.000-04:00

This past Friday night I went to Madison, Indiana, to see The Duhks. I made the drive up with Kelly, Melanie and Carol. I had only been introduced to The Duhks the week before when Kelly gave me a CD to listen to, and asked me if I wanted to go. The decision to go was easy after I gave them a quick listen.

We decided early in our drive to go with the flow...this was important as no one had the exact directions to the festival. We were told it could be fun to take the scenic route along the Ohio River, which is exactly what we did. This worked until we got a little lost in the Quarry Bluff subdivision. I am happy to report that I was traveling with a number of people with a great sense of direction and we made it to the festival in time for the concert.

Upon arrival we pulled out all of our picnic stuff and had dinner on the waterfront. Kelly is the owner of a magical backpack that contains a dinner set for four. There are wine glasses, silverware and a bottle opener. It's everything you need for an awesome picnic! Which was only made better by all the really great food that came together with very little planning! Perfect.

We were having such a good time at our picnic it was hard to decide whether or not to go into the festival. The decision was made more difficult by the fact that with the wind blowing in the right direction we could hear the music from where we were. We decided that we wanted to see the rest of the festival and that the wind shifts (which should be pronounced as one word) were not reliable enough to guarantee a good listening experience, and so we made our way into the festival...and just in time to hear their cover of Tracy Chapman's 'Mountain O' Things'!

I had an excellent time at the concert. I really dig this group!

The ride home included an impromptu animal-noise-making competition between Carol and Kelly. I was most impressed with Carol's impression of an elephant and Kelly's of a chicken. Strong work, ladies.

A few sights from San Francisco

2007-05-20T13:38:00.000-04:00

It occurs to me that I have neglected to share any of my (work) trip to San Francisco. Most of my time was spent in a meeting room at the Catholic retreat center where we were staying, but I'll leave those pictures out. Here's the little of the city that I was able to see. I'll have to make a trip out there sometime that isn't work-related.

This isn't so important...only that I fell in love with this tree. I started each morning by looking at it. Amazing.

I'm told that these are the purple mountain majesties...oh, and some sea lions.

A view of the city

I captured this shot without looking in the viewfinder. I'm awesome.

Randomness in Golden Gate Park

The Golden Gate Bridge

somedays you just wanna smile

2007-05-15T16:30:00.000-04:00

I'm having one of those days. One of those days where you wake up and it all just seems to be working, only I didn't realize it until I got out of my car at work this morning. I've been insanely happy all day...just in a really good mood. I don't know if it's because we placed at trivia last night (it was only our 5th week!), or because I learned how to make paper wallets, or because I had a really good discernment lunch, or because I learned how to make paper...(oh, I already said that one). Regardless, I'm just enjoying it. I do think I've almost made myself sick with all the laughing today. Nothing is better than that, Folks! Nothing!

Just FYI...I am selling my paper wallets for a small fee (just enough to keep me in business). If you'd like one, please email me and we can talk about what color you'd like and any other personal features you'd like added. We're also working on coming up with a waterproof feature, but my guys haven't worked out all the logistics just yet. I'll keep you updated.

Deep Peace

2007-05-11T14:39:00.000-04:00

deep peace of the running wave to you
deep peace of the flowing air to you
deep peace of the quiet earth to you
deep peace of the shining stars to you
deep peace of the gentle night to you
moon and stars
pour their healing light on you
deep peace to you

Peanut Butter and Jelly (only not)

2007-05-10T13:34:00.000-04:00

I'm traveling this week in San Francisco but have yet to see any part of the city. That will change tonight. I'm at a retreat center somewhere outside of the city. It is a beautiful place. I've loved going out each morning and experiencing the cool air. I am amazed that the air can be like this in May. I could never expect this type of weather in Texas at this time of year.

Like I said, this retreat center is really quite great. I'd love to be here for some reason other than work. Of course, that isn't the case. There has been one little problem that I've encountered while here: the availability of vegetarian food options. This is a common problem at work related events. I want to report that I have eaten four banana and peanut butter sandwiches in the past three days. Awesome, right?

Also, I have never eaten as much salad as I have in the past few days either. Seriously, that's pretty impressive for a vegetarian to do. I eat salad quite a bit. I was pleasantly surprised at lunch today when we had a veggie taco option. Nice work, Cafeteria, nice work!

I'd like to publicly thank peanut butter for providing my protein for the last few days and for getting me through until I get home. Your assistance is greatly appreciated.

You've been Derbied

2007-05-06T12:42:00.000-04:00

All around fantastic women (clockwise from left to right):
Melanie, Carol, Me, Kelly, Molly and Rachel.

All those with cooking abilities...I am not in this picture.

Time in the kitchen... There was lots of cooking, and just about none of it was done by me. I did, however, cut up the mangoes both mornings. On the second morning I got to use Kelly's knife which was pretty magical. I imagined the mango to be my equivalent of a turkey...you know, in terms of things that need carving. Note: I don't necessarily advocate the eating of turkey.

Left: Tiff and Rachel. Right: Kelly, with her security hand towel. She had one with her the entire weekend.

Melanie made peanut butter ice cream with chocolate.
Some days I resent the fact that I no longer eat sugar.

Later, Kelly helped her, uh, clean up the mess...

After watching my first horse race ever, we went and met some new friends to play pool and some people (I missed out) played darts. There are moments when I feel like my pool playing abilities are getting better. Yesterday was not one of them...Pictured left: Molly. She looks like she's enjoying herself, right? Right: Rachel and Tiff. I know, I know, I've pictured us here twice but we couldn't come to a consensus as to which picture we liked more. Please feel free to leave your thoughts in a comment.

Our new friends (left to right) Jasmine, Kenya, DC and Chandra.

OK, so yesterday was Cinco de Mayo...oh, and it was also the 133rd running of the Kentucky Derby (but if you want to sound like you're from Louisville you should say Derby One-Thirty-Three). This town has been gearing up for this sporting event for over a month now. Derby has been at every turn. There were banners, billboards, TV and radio commercials, and events where people run around pushing beds or carrying trays of drinks. That last one gets more attention than my mind is able to comprehend, but what do I know about the Derby? Apparently you can even go to a local grocery store and watch them assemble the garland of roses placed on the winning horse! Exciting, right?!? This store is so proud to be hosting this event they put a very sentimental commercial on TV about it...all while advertising their special on t-bone steaks and strawberries (for that very special Derby part). The first time I saw it I laughed out loud. I'm a little sad that I missed this event. And, in case you were wondering, I skipped out on the whole Derby hat bit. I did wear a baseball cap though, and I think this should count for something.

I spent Derby with some amazing women who provided me with hours and hours of laughter. I'll be recovering from their hilariousness the rest of the week. And, they provided me with an experience I've never had before. I'm still amazed that it happened. The race is about to start, and I've been properly schooled on horse racing by Rachel's mother, so I'm excited just to experience what's about to happen (not 30 minutes earlier I was rejecting all things Derby). I had never seen the race before I wasn't sure what to expect.

Here's the scene: Behind me is a room full of women shouting wildly at the television. In front of me? A sporting event being shown on a national broadcast. And what am I doing? I'm sitting there saying, "I'm confused. What's going on? I don't know what's happening!" Never in my life have I been surrounded by only women watching a sporting event and been the one who was confused. I think I'm carrying a little shame about that today.

Rise and Shine!

2007-05-03T09:06:00.000-04:00

How you wake up in the morning is a very important part of the day. It can determine how the rest of the day will go. I heard a Bible verse yesterday that reminded me of how my grandmother would wake us up whenever we would stay with her. I've never understood why she would say this to us, because she never struck me as a someone who knew a lot about the Bible. She would say, "Rise and shine, Peter. Time to slay and eat for tomorrow we may die." What?!? Tomorrow we may die? I mean, it's true, I could die today even, but who says this to 6 year old children?

Some others for the morning?

Cat Stevens' "Morning Has Broken". My father used to sing this to us on Sunday mornings.

Morning has broken, like the first morning
Blackbird has spoken, like the first bird
Praise for the singing, praise for the morning
Praise for them springing fresh from the word

This next one is a total camp thing. I never got into it, but a good friend of mine used to sing this at an unacceptable volume every morning. Sometimes, I thought about harming her...

Rise and shine
And give God the glory, glory
Rise and shine
And give God the glory, glory
Rise and shine
And give God the glory, glory
Children of the Lord

The Lord told Noah
To build him an arky, arky...(repeat)

He called for the animals
They came in by twosie, twosies...(repeat. This is where you poke your eyes out)

It rained and it poured
For forty daysie, daysies...(repeat. Not cool.)

There are so many other verses, it's pretty much like the song could go on forever. Forever. It's amazing that we were friends for that long.

Where I'm Livin'

2007-05-02T16:37:00.001-04:00

It's full on Derby-time here, and I've managed to avoid most of the "Fest-A-Ville" activities...until today. I borrowed some Pegasus Pins (your "ticket" into many Derby events) and a few of us made our way over to the Chow Wagon. Honestly, I can't even stand to say the words Chow Wagon, but that is its proper name. This is some of what we found there:

I have no words for this first image...I mean, just try to take it in...

That's Catherine. She says, "Don't eat foods if you can point to the same part on your body." Good call!

Catherine, Melanie and Kate reacting to an extremely inappropriate comment from the Corn Guy. I'd advise getting your sweet corn somewhere else...

Deep Fried Coke. Yeah, doesn't make sense to me either.

Kate ran into her long-lost friend. They hadn't seen each other in years!

Mainly, we went to people watch...

Are you kidding me?!? Tidy Taco? A "taco in a cone"? Someone help me out here! I'm already upset about this Saturday. May 5th. Cinco de Mayo. It's also Derby. I cannot get a break in this town!

Melanie was not happy with the Kettle Corn guy...hmmm...rough day for corn, I guess.

The U-Do-It Slush Factory. Catherine's excitement was wrapped up in a simple, "Ooooo, a slush factory!!!" Ah, the slush factory...

Focus on YOUR OWN Damn Family (Part Two)

2007-04-25T17:05:00.000-04:00

This was the part of the visit where we really felt like we left our mark. We left the soda shoppe after only a short visit because we wanted to make sure we had time in the bookstore. On our way upstairs, we saw this mailbox for children's prayer request. I told Kate that I needed to leave a prayer.

The Mailbox: I came up with an appropriate prayer...

(the mailbox before we got to it...)

...then with our prayer, which reads:

"dear god, i am 6 yrs old and i no that i am gay.

plese help me!!!

(I hope you can see Kate's amazing children's handwriting on there!)

The Bookstore: Kate and I separated in the bookstore, as there was a lot of ground to cover. If you want to go to FOTF, I urge you to go with someone who is willing to have as much fun with the experience as Kate. The next time I saw her, she was carrying a book in her hand...

The following is written by fellow traveler, Kate:

Read closely, folks. This is pure *mastery* (I don't know if that is a word).

I did not walk into the bookstore as 'Kate.' No, I walked into that bookstore, fully present as every young girl out there who is about to be invaded by this so-called RIGHTeous epicenter. Yes, just call me Sally Mc-I-am-at-the-age-where-it-is-most-important-for-open-and-loving-and-compassionate-people-and-churches-to-help-me-shape-my-beliefs-and-values-but-unfortunately-those-people-are-about-to-FAIL-me. That's me in the FOTF bookstore.

So, Tiff and I part ways as we enter the bookstore. This step is absolutely necessary for us if there is any hope for what's about to take place to happen without uncontrollable laughter and embarrassment. I begin strolling slowly and timidly through the aisles, like I'm looking for something specific, but I don't know where to find it and I am way too terrified to ask anyone. I keep my head down, making only the briefest eye contact with 'Peggy' behind the counter.

Now, Peggy looks like a nice enough lady. Pleated slacks, penny loafers, a loose blouse buttoned to the neck (we wouldn't want any skin showing at the FOTF bookstore!), silvery wavy hair, and soft, caring eyes. I continue to look nervously at the floor, then back up at Peggy. Finally, she approaches me gracefully, perhaps praying to herself (Oh heavenly father, please add this poor, lost soul to my Sinners-I-Have-Saved list in your heavenly book. Thank you, Pegs!) Anyway, Peggy leans in and says to me: 'Honey, is there anything I can help you with?' My heart starts racing, palms dripping, leg twitching...my mouth is dry and I manage to stammer (maybe with a tear in my eye): 'Um, I, uh, well... this is kind of embarrassing...I don't know...I don't know how to say this, uh, I feel, uh, awkward, um...well, do you, uh, happen to have any books on um, (in the softest whisper)...homosexuality?' There, I said it.

And now comes one of the proudest moments of my life. Dear Pegs takes a step away, scrunches her eyebrows just a bit, allows her eyes to travel condescendingly from my feet to the top of my head and says: 'Mmm...I see. Come this way.' You see? You see WHAT? I mean, don't judge me! I'm totally asking for a FRIEND...not myself. Uh, I was mortified. Anyway, Pegs and I walk over to the brilliantly named section, "Cultural Concerns," and she proceeds to personally point me to several titles, of which I am eternally grateful. (See ya on the golden streets of heaven, Pegs! Thanks again!) So, I pick out my favorite, I mean, the one I think my friend can really use, and proceed to meet up with Tiff again, my entire body shining because of what had just happened...

Tiffany, again:

After Kate explains to me all of what has happened, we leave the bookstore. Kate looks and me and says, "We should do something. We should leave notes for people in those books." She proceeds to take out her notebook and frantically begins writing, "It's OK that you're gay! It's OK that you're gay! It's OK that you're gay!", on several strips of paper. (The bookstore is closing, we have to hurry.) She gives me a handful of these strips and I make my way into the bookstore to leave our message in the following books:

Several people asked me why I would want to visit Focus on the Family...I think my reasons have been made fairly clear...

Focus on YOUR OWN Damn Family (Part One)

2007-04-25T14:40:00.001-04:00

I made a trip to Focus on the Family while in Colorado Springs this past weekend. Kate and I had been planning this for a couple of months, and I believe the field trip met every one of our expectations. If you don't know much about FOTF, you should visit their website. Everyone should develop their own opinions about this organization...I certainly have my own.

The purpose of the trip was twofold: to learn more about this organization (realizing it's not entirely fair to speak about something I haven't investigated a little bit), and to gather material for this post to share with all of you. Enjoy! (for the in-depth story and other pictures, you should email me...the story keeps getting longer...)

The Shrine: A room dedicated to James Dobson, Sr. and a little to James Dobson, Jr.

The plaque reads: During his days as a pastor and evangelist, James Dobson, Sr. acquired a reputation as "the man with no leather on the toes of his shoes." This is because he spent so much time on his knees in prayer--three to four hours a day when he was conducting evangelistic meetings. Today, his gravestone bears a simple two-word inscription: He prayed.

My response? "And whenever you pray, do not be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, so that they may be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward. But whenever you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Mother who is in secret; and your Mother who sees in secret will reward you." Matthew 6: 5-7

Jesus, who?: Their "on air" talent... Ah, yes, they are so humble...

The above reads: "For we do not preach ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus' sake." 2 Corinthians 4:5

Refreshments...for your soul:

This is my confession: My credit card was declined at the Whit's End Soda Shoppe. This was the highest and lowest point of the entire trip. We spent a total of $4.13 there. We purchased a bottle of water, peanut butter pretzels, and a small cup of mint chocolate chip ice cream.

Top 10 T-Shirt Ideas

2007-04-24T10:24:00.000-04:00

Alright, lately I've been obsessed with coming up with words and phrases to put on t-shirts. I keep saying I'm going to make these shirts, but none have come into being just yet. The whole thing started with Catherine's "Born to Boogie" shirt. Here are some ideas I have at present:

10. I'm a Lazy Lacey (encouragement I received from FOTF's Brio Magazine quiz on success. I took it from 16 year old Tiffany's perspective...I guess they'd be surprised to know I got that masters degree anyway. You can't trust those quizzes!)
9. I want to praise Jesus on the open water!
8. Born to Shuffleboard
7. Susie Shellenberger, I know your secret...
6. I'm a pen chewer (Kate's mother confessed this to me. I share the same identity.)
5. I was subversive at FOCUS ON THE FAMILY
4. Smoke Patrol (Reserved for those who smoke, but don't consider themselves a "smoker", and complain when they smell cigarette smoke in places where they don't think people should be smoking. You know who you are!)
3. I was ripped off at the Super 8 Motel in Weston, WV (they want an arm and a leg to fax one page! Where's the love, Super 8?!?)
2. Knee Deep In The Hoopla (because we built this city on rock n' roll!)
1. My credit card was declined at FOCUS ON THE FAMILY'S soda shoppe

The top two are definitely going to become a reality. I need to have these shirts. Now all I have to do is find a place in town to have them made. Any thoughts?

Why I'm Moving to Colorado...

2007-04-23T10:15:00.000-04:00

That's Pikes Peak in the background...

Kate and me and Garden of the Gods

Look at those rock formations...AMAZING!

Baby's Exciting Life

2007-04-20T10:22:00.000-04:00

I'm in Colorado this week for The White Privilege Conference. I think I've heard most of the jokes that anyone is going to come up with for the name of this conference, but if you feel like you've got something truly creative, please feel free to send it along.

I'm traveling with Kate, of Which Way to Our Nation's Capitol? fame, who is from Colorado. After we left the airport, we went to meet up with her friend. It was a strange meeting because Kate was under the impression we were going to her friend's house, but it became clear to us at some point that we were actually sitting in a home which her friend is going to buy. We sat on the couch and tried not to touch too many things. We tried...

After a little time, I noticed a notepad sitting on the coffee table. Upon closer examination of this notebook (don't judge me) I discovered that it was a detailed account of the life of a baby that lived in the household. Of course, I brought this to Kate's attention, and what followed is something that neither one of us can be that proud of, but which has since given me several moments of happiness. We read the entire entry, highlighting for each other the points we found particularly humorous, and then I had to excuse myself from the home because I was laughing uncontrollably and tears were pouring out of my eyes. If it wasn't so funny, I would entertain the idea of being ashamed of myself.

A quick note before you read this, this was in a notebook filled with accounts similar to what you are about to read...

Baby Journal entry for Wednesday, April 18, 2007:

8:25am zzz (we took this to mean the baby was sleeping...)

9:00am woke briefly-Lamby soothed her back to sleep

10:00am zzz

10:45am woke up

11:00am 6oz bottle. Pooped thru clothes :( walk outside--beautiful day. (Name of baby omitted) stayed awake. a few people stopped us on the street to say: "Wow! She has beautiful eyes!"

12:00pm walk

12:30pm upstairs play on blanket, sitting up

12:45pm zzz

1:00pm zzz woke briefly--cooing happily and talking to herself

2:00pm zzz

2:15pm woke up

2:30pm 6oz bottle

2:45pm bimbos and toys (inspectors arrive)

I cannot explain what it is about this that makes me laugh so much, but every time I think of the words "Pooped thru clothes", I lose it! As I write this, I am laughing so hard just thinking of the baby's parent as they wrote it down on paper...kills me! This probably makes me a horrible person, but I feel it my responsibility to make note of the funny things going on around me, and this has to be included.

Hay there!

2007-04-16T13:44:00.000-04:00

There is something strange happening around this town. On the walk from my car to the building yesterday morning I noticed some hay bales (though I've been told by a co-worker that they are called bales of hay...) sitting along the sidewalk. This isn't usually the case. My curiosity about the presence of hay in Louisville's downtown area led me to take a quick survey of some people at work who have lived here for a long time, but their explanations were lacking. Most seemed to believe it was to either protect the grass or to keeps seeds from being eaten by birds. Yeah, I have no idea what kind of seeds or birds we're talking about here.

Regardless of their initial hypothesis, they all indicated it must have something to do with Thunder Over Louisville. I'm not entirely sure what this whole Thunder thing entails, only that it seems to be the official kickoff for all things Kentucky Derby, and I'm told that anything weird I see around town for the next few weeks should be attributed to Derby. I'll be missing this weekend's madness, which I'm told is essentially a lot of noise pollution, because I'll be out of town. For now, I'm both interested and a little concerned about what is about to happen as the city prepares for what people tell me amounts to a 2-minute horse race. (I probably shouldn't say anymore...I've noticed that sarcasm is not appreciated around these parts when the subject matter is horses.)

Livin' It Up Holy Week Style!

2007-04-11T21:26:00.000-04:00

This past weekend was Easter weekend. It's more than Easter Day though. It's Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, and Holy Saturday. This year, I observed the weekend like never before. Here's the rundown...

Maundy Thursday:

Seder Meal with local congregations. I had not been to a Seder meal since 8th Grade Confirmation class. I can't remember if we were allowed to have actual wine then, even if just to taste it, but I definitely did this time around as an adult.
Wild Oats run with Kate. The store was empty for the most part, which really worked in my favor. This way, when Kate asked me to track down certain products (I was trying to be helpful) I could easily access a store clerk to direct me to the item in question. I did not even attempt to find any of these items on my own. BACKGROUND INFO: On a previous independent trip to the grocery store, I decided that I would be a horrible contestant on SuperMarket Sweep. I walked by the "Battery Center" four times before I noticed a single battery. Pathetic. I think this is where a parent would have interjected the always hilarious, "If it was a snake it would have bitten you!" Always love that one.
A Bar. I won't mention the name of this place, mainly because I wouldn't endorse it in any way, but you'll know the place if you're within a few blocks of it...just follow the overwhelming smell of cigarette smoke...it should take you right there. Seriously, they need a ventilation system. It did serve as a place to hangout with some good people and meet some new good people.

Good Friday, err, the Goodest of all the Fridays:

This was the first of two days spent at Melanie's. There was good food, good music, good conversation. I believe there was also some good napping. Yes. Good napping.
From there we moved to a co-worker's place for more good times and food. I left the gathering for just a bit to attend a Good Friday service. This was a very meaningful time for me and I was really happy that I took the time go to this.
The Bar. It was time to go watch some line dancing. It's amazing the things that will grow on you. I still refuse to do any line dancing myself, but just watching people enjoy themselves in this way brings me so much happiness. It really does.

Holy Saturday:

Melanie's. All day. Again. This time with an 'L Word' Marathon. TIP: I'd suggest not participating in a marathon of any show/any season twice in one month. I'm convinced it's not good for the brain. If you choose to ignore my advice, proceed with caution... I believe this went on for a good 9 hours. But, I'm tough, and I've lived to tell about it.
Then it was out to Camp Cedar Ridge for a Pascal fire with CCC. It was cold, so Catherine and I thought it appropriate to "boo" people for standing in front of us and blocking the heat of the fire. I think they appreciated this.

Easter:

Sunrise Service. With only a few hours of sleep I made my way to a sunrise service in town and met many interesting people. One woman was convinced that I had an English accent. I do not, and I felt quite ridiculous when I had to tell her that I don't. She appeared confused, but I couldn't think of any other way to convince her otherwise...
Then I attended another service, you know, the kind with banners and everything... Melanie had to keep me from stealing a little boy that was sitting near the front. He was dressed in his little dress pants, shirt, vest and tie. Adorable.
The other interns and I were invited to a couple of homes for Easter dinner. I was so thankful to have a place to go on a day when I would usually be with family. It was nice to be able to spend it with people that I have been getting to know since I have come here.

After all the Easter dinner hopping, there was sleep, and it was really needed at that point. In fact, I spent most of the week recovering from this, the holiest of all the weekends...

Sure am glad it's raining

2007-04-09T09:59:00.000-04:00

There was crying. There was laughing. It was camping.

While I was growing up I was completely obsessed with 'Ernest Goes to Camp', starring Jim Varney. If you have not seen this movie, please stop reading this and rent it! You need to know this movie. Anytime I have ever gone camping, I have imagined that I would end up with a turtle biting my nose, but I wouldn't mind because that would mean I had something in common with Ernest P. Worrell. I've also imagined that I'd be able to save some campgrounds from oppressive corporate types, thus allowing the land to remain for all peoples. (Let this be an indication to you of my active imagination...) None of these things happened when I went camping a couple of weekends ago.

I had decided to go camping because I was in need of some personal retreat time. It had become quite apparent to me that I should get away from it all, and it turned out to be exactly what I needed. I left early from work that Friday, and headed out to Taylorsville Lake State Park. I decided to camp at a primitive site (this sounds more adventurous than it is), which essentially means tent camping. There are a few challenges to camping alone, but there isn't anything that can't be overcome. You just have to realize early on that most things will take a little more time because there is only one person to complete the task. It only took putting up the tent (thanks to Rachel for letting me borrow one!) for me to come to this realization. This was when I decided to take the weekend as it came, and I think my time out there was greatly improved because of that attitude.

After I put the tent up I made a fire. The only thing I can suggest here is to use lots of lighter fluid, and to gather smaller sticks from around the campsite to help get things started. I had a delightful meal of Spaghetti O's and canned corn. These aren't items that I eat a lot of otherwise, but it seemed appropriate for a camping adventure. Then it was time to go to bed. A little over an hour in to my sleep it started to rain, and rain hard.

Insert singing of "Gee I'm Glad It's Raining" from 'Ernest Goes to Camp":

Gee I'm glad it's raining
There's always something to be thankful for.
I'm awfully glad it's raining
Cause no one sees the tear drops when it pours.

And no one knows the thunder
As your heart breaks in the sky,
And they think those rainy nights
Cause that sad look in your eye.

Sure am glad it's raining.
The gentle river soothes the pain inside.
I'm glad the stars aren't shining.
This wounded warrior needs a place to hide.

I'll have you know that I laughed the entire time I was trying to put on my jacket to go outside and get the tarps for the tent. Again, just taking the weekend as it comes... This was one of the moments during the weekend when I asked myself, "What are you doing here?" I think I found my answer over time.

Saturday was spent on a 5 1/2 hour hike. It wasn't supposed to go this long, but I just let the trail take me. Now, early on there was a massive tree that had fallen in the middle of the trail, and I'm pretty sure there was some kind of hiker's symbol telling me not to cross there, but I'm fairly stubborn... I made my way around the tree and decided to continue. I would question this decision the rest of the way. Anytime I wasn't sure I was going the right direction, I'd wonder if I was even supposed to be on this trail. An hour-and-a-half into the hike something miraculous happened. In the distance I saw a small metal pole coming out of the ground with an arrow pointing in the direction I was walking. I was going the right way! I eventually made my way to the lake where I had some great mediation/prayer/reading time. Then I got stupid...

I decided to take this hiking show off trail. For nearly two hours I was asking myself, "What are you doing?!?", but refused to turn back. Stubborn. The route I decided to take was packed with driftwood along the beach of the lake. At one point in all of this I found myself hugging a tree tyring not to fall backwards into the lake, while my legs were on either side of another fallen tree. This was the moment where I feared having to be rescued in this rather ridiculous position, and only be able to tell my rescuers, "So, I shouldn't have crossed that first big fallen tree, huh?"

I spent the rest of the afternoon resting and gathering sticks for that evening's fire. It's amazing the things that will bring you satisfaction, like gathering enough pieces of lose wood to make a fire that will heat your dinner. It rained again that night and got a little cold, but tarps are pretty fantastic and so I never got wet.

All in all it came close to being a perfect weekend. I think it's important for us to listen to ourselves, to what we need, and to not be afraid to spend quiet time with ourselves. There were moments before I went out there that I was worried about what I might discover in all that quiet time, but I came away with a lot of peace, and the beginnings of some letting go...

Lost sole

2007-03-30T12:19:00.000-04:00

The drama with my tennis shoes (the ones that got soaked in DC) will not end. When I came back from DC I put the shoes out to dry in the garage. I took the in-soles (I'm not entirely sure how this is usually written) out and put them on the counter. I've looked for them three times this week and cannot find them. I think I'm going crazy. Why would they want to go away from their shoes? I hope they know they are useless without the rest of the shoe. And! No one is going to care for them the way that I have. Obviously, losing these things has caused quite a bit of frustration. I just don't understand the world sometimes. It's a difficult place for me.

It's all in your head

2007-03-26T16:16:00.000-04:00

The truth is that the Tiffany B Excellent Day Project has been struggling a bit these last few days. It happens. If it didn't, the project probably wouldn't exist; there would be no need for it.

I saw a bumper sticker as I was driving around town this weekend. It still has me thinking. It read, "You don't have to believe everything you think." I'm not sure how it's meant to be read, but I take it mean that a lot of what we tell ourselves just isn't true. This is especially the case when the things we think are hurtful and negative ideas about ourselves. If you are like me, when you begin to go down this road you start to put distance between others and yourself. It only compounds the problem.

What's interesting here though, is that resisting the urge to create that distance actually leads to the healing. I'm amazed every time I see it. It is truly powerful to see the positive impact we can have on one another, and I'm grateful for all the people I encounter who are helping me to create the connection, even when they aren't aware of what they're doing. Yeah, some of these days can be tough, but when I remain open to the connections wherever I may find them, it makes "getting by" a lot easier.

Which way to our nation's capitol? (Part Three)

2007-03-22T22:28:00.000-04:00

"Oh (insert expletive)!"...This was the first thing I said Saturday morning. I don't remember why I said this, but I'm sure it had something to do with not having showered in two days, standing in the cold and rain the day before, and once again sleeping under the window. It was early and things were getting pretty desperate for us. Let's just say that maintaining a "Tiffany B Excellent Day Project" attitude was going to be tough, but I was going to do my best.

We made our way to a local church to volunteer for a workshop. (I will note that by this point we had improved our navigation skills through the city. Really! It was quite impressive!) The workshop turned out to be pretty good, though I'd be hard pressed to recall too many of its details. I do remember wanting to cry several times throughout the day due to exhaustion, but to my recollection I did not. I hope this is the case.

And then I was given a beautiful gift. A fantastic woman opened up her home to let us use her shower, and I have never been so happy to see bottles of shampoo and conditioner in my life. Wow. Now I'm just being dramatic... Seriously though, it was a weekend highlight, and was made even better by the beer we were offered before and after our showers. Talk about an excellent day...

Later we went to meet people for dinner, and I did something I've always wanted to do: Pull out a map in a restaurant and plan a travel route. We had to do some planning because we had agreed that going along State Highway 50 again was not a wise option.

And so, we left our nation's capitol and headed for home...

We drove a few hours before deciding to stop in Cumberland, MD, for the night.

The memorable Cumberland Motel, our home for the night...

The Cumberland Motel was an easy choice for an overnight stay due to its "easy on, easy off" access road, and because there did not appear to be any other lodging establishments in the area. The folks at The Cumberland will take care of you, too. There are painted signs on the pavement that read "9ft↑" and "Office←" just in case you get lost in their massive parking lot. At midnight, and then again at 7:30am, this seemed very amusing to me. Oh, I would say that if you stop by, please be prepared to encounter their attack dog, Sparky (yeah, I made up the name). He gave me a good scare when I got out of the car, but I showed him who's boss... Actually, it was a very small dog, but I'm easily frightened. Additionally, I am happy to report that the "Honor System" is alive and well in Cumberland, MD. Need proof? The sign next to the room phone reads, "Please leave a quarter for every call you make." Awesome, right?

We hit the road again in the morning and made only a few stops along the way, including...

...K&T's Truck Stop, which ended up with me in tears, but we'll leave that story for another time. We were just excited to stop there because we thought it was a truck stop designed especially for us. It was not.

We made really good time back to Louisville, and I am able to report that we were still speaking with one another after the whole thing was over. All in all, despite some weather issues, it came pretty close to being a perfect weekend. I can only hope that your next road trip experience will be as great as mine.

THE END.

Which way to our nation's capitol? (Part Two)

2007-03-21T15:23:00.000-04:00

A few things can happen after you've been in the car all day with the same person. You can turn on each other, or you can live it up in complete silliness. I am happy to report that we chose silliness and laughing through the misery of going to sleep on a cold floor. Kate was a little smarter than I was and chose a spot that wasn't directly under a window. I complained the rest of the night about how there was cold air coming over the side of the wall, but refused to move. This, along with my snoring, made me a favorite both nights we were there.

We woke up the next morning to, yep, more rain. It just wouldn't stop. For this reason, Kate had to buy some awesome rain boots. The boots are red, and with her green poncho she looked very Christmas-y. We managed to find our way to the store with out any problems, which could only mean one thing, it was time for us get lost in our nation's capitol. The city is broken up into quadrants, and I think we hit everyone of them on the way to meet up with some people. If you're every traveling through there by car, make sure you get the NE-NW-SE-SW part of the directions. It'll save you a lot of time and energy. OK, that brings to an end my directional PSA for DC.

In the afternoon, the rain turned to freezing rain, and so it became really important to remind myself why I was there (especially after stepping in a cold puddle of water with my mesh-top shoes...). So, I adopted a motto: THIS IS THE VERY LEAST I CAN DO. And, that was really quite true. The very least I could do was stand in the cold, freezing (later snow) rain to demonstrate for peace in Iraq. There are, after all, people in Iraq who have to endure far worse things on a daily basis because of this war. Yes, the very least I could do...

We made our way to worship at the National Cathedral, which was amazing and powerful...

And, then we had a procession from there to the White House, which is a 4-mile walk. It was snowing quite heavily when we came out of the cathedral, but somewhere along the way it let up...

Reaching the White House...

Kate and Me. Completely freezing. And tired. In front of the White House.

Soon after this we went back to the church because the group thought my feet were in danger of falling off from frostbite. I'm happy to report that I do not have frostbite, at least not to my knowledge...

Which way to our nation's capitol? (Part One)

2007-03-20T18:00:00.001-04:00

This weekend marked the 4th anniversary of the start of the war in Iraq. I made my way to DC for the second weekend in a row and attended the Christian Peace Witness for Iraq. I made the trip this time by car instead of flying. That's right, ROAD TRIP! Life can bring you excitement in many forms, but one of the most special of these is a road trip. There are plenty of things to plan, pack, and completely forget. This trip included all of these.

Oh! Before we get started I should introduce Kate. Kate and I work with each other and made the trip together. She's a self-professed non-planner, and I love planning routes and making mental check lists for what to bring (this is all my father's influence). So, could we survive the trip together? Would we still be speaking to each other after being in the car for 1300+ miles and over 25 hours? Did either of us seriously consider leaving the other at one of the many restroom breaks we took? Read on to find out...

This is Kate and well, you already know me...

A check of Weather.com (one of the best websites out there) earlier in the week revealed that we would encounter some weather (this is what we call it in Texas) during the drive on Thursday. We were informed correctly on this front. It rained every single minute of the drive on Thursday. There was also fog and the cold. But, even though the weather was not in our favor our spirits were high!

Besides the rain, the ride was fairly uneventful until we reached Weston, West Virginia. It was here that Kate found herself in the middle of a work-related mess which meant she need to find a fax machine. Note: While the Kroger was good for provolone cheese and veggie sandwich slices (roasted turkey flavored), it was not good for hummus or faxing important information. Kate had to travel to a few other businesses and ask them to use their fax machine, and when she finally found one that would, they charged her over $5 to do so. Kate mentioned the injustice of being charged such an expensive fee no less than 7 times on the road to DC, and mentioned it for the last time after one in the morning. I haven't asked her if she's completely over the incident just yet as I'm afraid it may cause her to lose any respect she may have left for Super 8 Motels.

Now, until this part of the trip we'd made several decisions together, you know...where to stop, who's driving, what music should be played, but our most important decision was whether to deviate from the previously agreed upon route. And, we did! We decided to take State Highway 50 from Clarksburg to Winchester. On the map this looks likes a relatively easy road to pass, and even appears to be a shortcut, but be forewarned travelers, it's no shortcut! It is a trip through the mountains of West Virginia with winding, climbing roads that will test your stomach's ability to hold on to the cinnamon raisin bagel with provolone cheese and veggie sandwich slices that you had earlier. Obviously, we made it through the mountains, even though I believe it added a couple of hours to the trip and caused me a great deal of internal anxiety. All-in-all, I think we were happy we had the experience. Also, I should take this opportunity to thank the Aurora School (Grades K-12) for the use of their bathroom, as their were no other public toilets while in the mountains. Your hospitality was appreciated! Folks, if you're ever in the area please stop by this fantastic educational institution...just pretend like you're there for the basketball game, too.

Once off the mountain, we made the final stretch of diving to our nation's capitol...

"...and How are the Children?"

2007-03-13T22:26:00.000-04:00

I spent the weekend in Washington, D.C., at a conference for work. The focus was children's issues, and I had the opportunity to hear Marian Wright Edelman, Founder and President of the Children's Defense Fund. I don't usually include other people's work here, but I want to share the prayer she said at the end of her speech.

"O God, forgive and transform our rich nation where small babies and children suffer from preventable diseases and sickness quite legally.

Forgive and transform our rich nation where small children suffer from hunger quite legally.

Forgive and transform our rich nation where toddlers and school children die from guns sold quite legally.

Forgive and transform our rich nation that lets children be the poorest group of citizens quite legally.

Forgive and transform our rich nation that lets the rich continue to get more at the expense of the poor quite legally.

Forgive and transform our rich nation that thinks security rests in missiles and bombs rather than in mothers and in babies.

Forgive and transform our rich nation for not giving You sufficient thanks by giving to others their daily bread.

Help us never to confuse what is quite legal with what is just and right in Your sight.

Help us as leaders and citizens to stand up in 2007 for all Your children and give them the anchor of faith, the rudder of hope, the sails of health care and education, and the paddles of family and community to navigate the tumultuous sea of life and land safely on the shore of adulthood."

Marian Wright Edelman, Guide My Feet, 1995, Beacon Press

It's practically summer

2007-03-07T17:05:00.000-05:00

I don't have much to say here except that when I left the house this morning it was 54 degrees. AND! I didn't have to bring a sweatshirt or coat to work. Awesome. It felt like Houston in December out there this morning (without all the humidity). Nice.

No kind of scruples

2007-02-26T22:57:00.000-05:00

First, I'm going to ask that you not judge me for taking advantage of everything that happened yesterday when I went to see Senator Barak Obama. There are times in life when things simply fall into place and you just have to go with it. This is what I did.

I decided to arrive an hour before the doors opened because I knew there would be a big crowd to see the Senator. When I drove up to the hotel there was already a long line down the block. I parked in the parking garage of the hotel where I didn't have the cash to pay for it up front. (A big thanks to the guy who told me I could pay with a card over the phone!) After parking I took the elevator up to the lobby and asked someone where I could get in line for the event. He told me, "Go out these doors and the line is right there." And, sure enough, it was. I joined the line, officially becoming the last person in line. Nice. I did meet some very nice people, and one who seemed to be very well known, but not to me. After several people came up to this gentleman and told him things like, "It's so nice to see you here" and "I just wanted to tell you I'm a huge fan", I determined he must be someone important. A woman who had come behind me in the line finally asked someone who he was and we were informed that his name is Winston Bennett and had played basketball for the University of Kentucky and in the NBA. So, I got a picture with him and we became friends throughout the rest of the event. Call me, Winston!

After taking the picture, I became really aware of the fact that only one person had come behind me in line. I thought this was really strange. With still 30 minutes until the doors opened and and hour-and-a-half until the event started, I assumed more people would show up. The woman who was behind me in line noticed the same thing, and so inquired with the couple standing in front of us. It was then that we discovered we were, in fact, standing at the front of the line. This other woman and I had cut the entire line of people waiting to see Barak Obama. Thankfully we were dealing with a very friendly crowd who didn't make a big deal about our mistake. In fact, they invited us to remain at the front of the line with them...unless it violated any of our morals...it did not. So, I was now the third person in line.

Barak and the hand of someone behind me...Not sure this guy got to shake his hand, but he was trying...

Once inside I was only behind a few people who had special passes. I also was able to meet Representative Derrick Graham (D) who serves in the Kentucky Legislature. We had to wait a long time for the Senator to show as there was a blizzard or something in Chicago. Eventually he showed up and there was a lot of excitement. After he spoke he went around the rope line shaking hands. This was my opportunity. I'll say it's not really in my nature to make this kind of thing happen, but I felt compelled to try. I tried and I was successful! I was able to shake his hand and it was the perfect end to a fantastic weekend. Actually, the perfect end to the weekend was the woman who did not make me pay for parking on my way out. I promised her I wouldn't say anything about it, but it was too good not to share.

To Parker Beam!

2007-02-24T23:23:00.000-05:00

I've been looking for a reason to take a drive outside the city and finally got my chance. Cory and I made our way out to Bardstown, Kentucky, which is only 30 or so miles away, but a nice drive. We stopped along the way to take a look at some of the countryside. Our destination for the day was the Bourbon Heritage Center where we would watch a movie on bourbon making, and see thousands of barrels of bourbon not yet ready to be bottled.

On our tour we met Joan, the Bourbon Host, and a couple of men from Texas. At this point there was only one other person on the tour, so four of the five of us were from Texans. Joan was a fantastic host who told us about all things bourbon including the difference between single barrel and small batch bourbons. Cory left feeling like an expert, especially after mastering some of the questions posed during the taste testing. It is for this reason that Cory now believes he can one day become Parker Beam, Heaven Hill Master Distiller, whose job it is to determine when barrels of bourbon are ready to be bottled. We were told that when a barrel is ready, Parker will tell everyone, "It's a go!", to which everyone cheers loudly and throws a big party (OK, I made that part up...)

Our favorite part of the tour was Joan, who was mostly hilarious. There were two things that she said though that will keep her from being my favorite person ever. Her major downfall occurred when she referred to me as Cory's wife. Cory and I were separated going into the "tasting barrel" and when Cory came through the door she practically screamed "Your wife is over there!" so that the entire tour group (now 10 people in size) could hear it. This was the most uncomfortable moment of the weekend, but we were able to laugh about it...in time... Then Joan made me feel like a complete idiot when she told the group that bourbon is no longer bourbon when you introduce a foreign substance to it. So, according to Joan, you should never add any Coke or Pepsi products to bourbon. I apologized to Joan and the rest of the class for not knowing better the night before, and promised to never do it again. I think she has forgiven me.

Oh, something like that

2007-02-23T23:57:00.000-05:00

I wanted to write this with Cory, who is visiting from Dallas this weekend, but he has refused. OK, maybe he didn’t refuse, but it felt like he was when he decided to go to sleep rather than listen to my brilliant ideas for this post… I wanted to write this out like a conversation between the two of us, but he didn’t see the genius in it. Where’s the respect?!?

Cory arrived earlier today and I told him we had some very important business to attend to as soon as he landed. What business? Tickets to see Barak Obama on Sunday evening! When we arrived at Glassworks for the tickets there were only 25-30 people in front of us, and then the line seemed to explode. We arrived at the exact right time. This gave me a pretty good feeling about how the weekend would develop.

After a quick tour of my work and dinner, we decided to stop at Shenanigan’s Irish Pub on the way home. Here we discovered that Shenanigan’s is not actually a pub, and the verdict is still out on whether it’s even Irish. As soon as we pulled up to this establishment we realized that we were probably not going to fit in with everyone. It appeared to be a place where mostly regulars attend, and we definitely weren’t regulars…but, neither was the gentleman sitting at the bar who was practically wearing a three-piece suit. We think he was lost. So, what did we do to keep a low profile? We took a picture of ourselves in front of the sign, to which one patron replied, “that seemed like a Kodak moment”.

Once settled inside we noticed the killer karaoke that was happening. These people appeared very serious about performing for one another, which should have deterred Cory from sharing his vocal talents with the world, but it did not. Cory decided on Tim McGraw’s “Something Like That” and he was a star. ♪I worked so hard for that first kiss And a heart dont forget something like that♪ Awesome. Some other karaoke highlights from other would-be singers included “Kiss and Say Goodbye” and “Crazy”. After Cory sang karaoke seemed to end and there was line dancing to some fake hip-hop. This was our cue to exit.

We were there for a total of 45 minutes, but I think we’ll have enough memories to last us a lifetime…

A dream come true

2007-02-21T16:21:00.000-05:00

I don't know how I forgot to share this information here, but I'm doing it now. Something truly amazing happened to me last Thursday. I was sitting in a meeting with people from out-of-town, and they were introducing themselves. One member informed us that another member was a Dallas Cowboy in a former life! That was the most exciting thing to happen to me all week. He later asked me (after he was properly informed of my Cowboy obsessiveness) what I wanted to know. I responded to this by becoming completely overcome with nervousness and was unable to form one question to ask him. Waste. The next day he shared more about his experience during that time for which I was extremely thankful. There isn't much more to this story, except to say that I'm so excited I officially know someone who once played for the Greatest Sports Team to Ever Walk the Earth!

The Open Road

2007-02-20T15:42:00.000-05:00

I took a different route to work today. It's the first time I've done this since I moved to Louisville. I've never gone a different way because when I arrived here people told me the way I've been going is the fastest. I've questioned the validity of this for quite awhile, but continued to assume that people who have lived here for a long time would know what's best. I was in the mood for something a little different today, and so I decided to take the freeway. The main appeal of this is not having to drive through roughly twenty lights on the way to work. My chosen path today included less than a handful. Awesome.

My first observation about "rush hour" in Louisville? Traffic is actually pretty light. How light? I was moving the entire way to work. This would not be the case in many cities across the country, and is certainly not true for the city where I used to live. This one aspect of the commute may be enough for me to drive an estimated 10 miles longer to get to work. And, even though that was the case, I arrived at work an entire 8 minutes earlier. This doesn't sound like much, and truthfully it isn't. But, there is a factor you are not considering. I was able to drive at speeds well over 40 miles and hour for almost my entire ride to work today. This is something that I really appreciate. I'll refrain from disclosing the speeds that I reached today as all of them may not have been exactly in speed limit range. So, will I be changing my route to work perminately? Probably not. But, it does feel good to have an alternative.

Dilemma in Aisle 11

2007-02-19T21:10:00.000-05:00

I had the day off, you know, to celebrate the life and work of all our presidents… My celebration took the form of several naps throughout the day, and lots of television/movie watching. There really is a science to this whole “taking it easy” thing. You just have to let yourself flow from one thing to the next. You cannot fight the onset of your third nap of the day; you have to submit to it.

I did manage to cook myself breakfast, lunch and dinner, but in order to do that I had to make my way to the grocery store. In all honesty, it has been several weeks since I’ve bought any significant amount of groceries, so my day off seemed like the perfect opportunity to tackle this particular errand.

Let me say that grocery shopping isn’t my favorite thing in the world, and the fact that I refuse to make a list doesn’t help the situation much. So, I show up unprepared and end up hating myself for not putting more thought into the process ahead of time. It’s really an uplifting time for me. What I dislike most about the whole thing is having to choose between variations on the same product when I couldn’t care less about their differences. Let’s use the laundry aisle as an example. It was time for me to buy more detergent and dryer sheets (yeah, very exciting times!), and so I began to look through the aisle at what appears to be an endless selection of stuff to clean my clothes. I’m not convinced I need this many choices when it comes to this matter, but there they are. I know how ridiculous it all is when I realize I’m picking up different boxes of dryer sheets and smelling them, as if it has ever mattered to me whether my clothes smell like springtime or mountain breeze (or whatever it was). In case you’re curious, I decided on springtime. On the upside, this was the most difficult decision I had to make all day…

Louisville hearts Texas

2007-02-17T19:08:00.000-05:00

As I've made my way around this town I've started to pick up on something: Louisville loves all things Texas. I'm not sure this town knows it just yet, but it's true. Here's a few points for your consideration.

1) Shoes. There is a store on the corner of Preston and Market that sells SAS Shoes. SAS shoes are, of course, made in San Antonio. I see this sign everyday which says, "Made in Texas". How fantastic is that?!? Pretty fantastic, I think...

2) Ice Cream. OK, this is a relatively new development, at least to me. In the past two days I've seen the same billboard in two different locations around town. I haven't done enough investigating yet to know if it's being done by an individual or the company, but either way I'm a fan. The billboards are in purple (maybe one was blue) with white text. They read, "Dear Blue Bell, I can't get your ice cream in Louisville. Help!"...signed by Sara Something-or-Other from Louisville, KY. Don't know what Blue Bell is? It's ice cream made in Brenham, Texas. I'd recommend the plant tour if you're ever in the area. As I said, I'm not sure who's behind the billboards, but I'm anxious to find out.

3) Texas Road House. Mainly they serve a lot of food that I don't eat, but with 3 locations around town, it's not impossible to see a TEXAS flag flying high! Beautiful.

4) Louisville pretty much wants to be Austin. Check out "Keep Austin Weird". I believe Austin had the market on this first, but you can't blame Louisville for trying...

Ninety-seven

2007-02-05T21:40:00.000-05:00

Today is my Tia's 97th birthday. She is the strongest woman I know, and my hope is that I will be able to live my life with as much courage and love as she does. As a child, I would follow her around her house and watch everything she did. I was fascinated by her then, and I still am today. She is truly amazing. Her work and dedication to family has resulted in a lot of the opportunities that I have today. I am truly grateful for her life.

NOLA

2007-02-04T08:46:00.000-05:00

I went to New Orleans a few weeks ago for a conference. Things have been really busy for me so I still haven't had the opportunity to process what I saw and what is going on there (and what is not). I wanted to included some pictures that I took while I was there.

The black line on this home shows where the water settled after it was done rising.

Low-income housing complex where most people have not been able to return. We were told that there are currently no plans to make these units livable for the families who lived here.

A memorial in the Lower 9th Ward to the victims of Hurricanes Katrina and Rita.

a little something for cold and flu season...

2007-02-01T11:13:00.000-05:00

Lately, my place of employment has been doing a lot to raise awareness about germs. This morning's educational piece directed us to a video about coughing and sneezing on our clothes...apparently, it's patriotic! Please watch this video to see what I'm talking about.

Your children aren't safe

2007-01-30T17:57:00.000-05:00

On my way to work today I saw something that I'm sure any parent (I am not one) would find disturbing. A school bus carrying a handful of children was completely out of control. One young girl was hurling herself over the seats; she made her way down a significant stretch of the bus. A boy was jumping up and down in his seat (and, I think, on top of one of the other riders). I believe he had been possessed by whatever sugar-filled concoction he had for breakfast an hour before. I could see children yelling at the top of their lungs and the bus driver was no match for them. I could see her telling them to stop, and giving them that look that bus drivers give passengers in the huge rear view mirror above them. But, like I said, she didn't stand a chance. They were enjoying themselves a bit too much.

This had me thinking about how difficult it must be for people who are raising children to leave them in another person's care. Inevitably, these people never give the kind of attention or guidance the parent would give. I used to babysit quite a bit and while I never let the children do things that were terribly harmful, I know I let them do things that their parents would not let them do. It wasn't anything too bad, maybe just staying up later than they should or letting them run in the street (only kidding...) I actually enjoyed babysitting for this one family quite a bit. One of the girls seemed to use our time together to ask all those pressing questions that children ask. The only one that was more difficult to navigate besides "Where to babies come from?", was the "Why do people have to die?" one. Yeah, you wish you could have seen me approach these at the age of sixteen... The best part of the night was always reporting these inquiries back to the parents, along with a list of words or comments they made that I thought were questionable. I took my duties seriously, and I think it caused me a bit of anxiety at the time. I'm just glad I don't have to rely on that source of income anymore...